Character: Jessica Wakefield

Aspiring serial killer. Utterly selfish and ruthless, snobby and vapid.

Sweet Valley High #25: Nowhere to Run

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Wing recaps Sweet Valley High #25: Nowhere to Run and what looks like a simple evil stepmother story ends with Wing BURNING EVERYTHING TO THE GROUND.

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Sweet Valley High Super Edition #2: Special Christmas

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Dove recaps Sweet Valley High Super Editions #2: Special Christmas wherein the specialness is ranked by how many whispered conversations the Wakefields can have about Suzanne Devlin.

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Sweet Valley High #24: Memories

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Raven recaps Sweet Valley High #24, in which Steven Wakefield grapples with love, grief, and loss, all of which are better than grappling with a bloody lawnmower.

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Sweet Valley High #23: Say Goodbye

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Wing recaps Sweet Valley High 23: Say Goodbye and oh, it would help if she gave one flying fuck about Todd and Liz’s relationship, but since she doesn’t, be prepared for some nitpicking when cars and names change within a few pages.

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Sweet Valley High #22: Too Much In Love

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Raven recaps Sweet Valley High #22: Too Much In Love, in which he feels empathy for DeeDee and Bill while dicking about with a friendly AI robot.

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Sweet Valley High Super Edition #1: Perfect Summer

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Dove recaps Sweet Valley High Super Edition #1: Perfect Summer, where most of the action is off screen but it makes up for it with 240 pages of dish washing.

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Sweet Valley High #21: Runaway

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Wing recaps Sweet Valley High #21: Runaway, and it was going so well! Jessica’s depression worked! And then that rushed, Thank God For Liz ending ruined it.

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Sweet Valley High #20: Crash Landing!

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Raven recaps Sweet Valley High #20: Crash Landing! In which not even a titular exclamation point can muster up a flicker of interest.

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Sweet Valley High #19: Showdown

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Dove recaps Sweet Valley High #19: Showdown the age-old story of two girls fighting over a boy. Who tries to kill one of them.

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Sweet Valley High #18: Head Over Heels by Francine Pascal

Sweet Valley High #18: Head Over Heels

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Wing recaps Sweet Valley High #18: Head Over Heels and would have found it charming and silly had the romantic hero not been BRUCE FUCKING PATMAN, abusive rapist.

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Sweet Valley High #16: Rags to Riches

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Dove recaps Sweet Valley High #16: Rags to Riches, wherein a cute boy becomes rich, and Jessica suddenly wants to date him. And it’s actually better than it sounds.

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The cover is blueish grey with orange text - a particularly horrible combination and the text is harder to read because each colour is very muted, so they don't pop against each other. Standard porthole cover, with Trisha Martin standing in the foreground visible from the ribs up, she has short chestnut hair and dark eyes. She's wearing an oversized blue shirt with a white collar that makes her look like a maid (not sure how we're supposed to infer this is a hard-drinking slut from such prissy attire). No pose, arms at sides. Behind her, one of the twins stands with her hand on her chin, looking somewhere between thoughtful and murderous. The hair implies it's Liz, but the vicious look in her eye says Jessica. She's wearing an orange tank top.

Sweet Valley High #15: Promises

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Wing recaps Sweet Valley High #15: Promises and hates every goddamn second of this hypocritical Jessica and death by cancer fucking book.

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Sweet Valley High #13: Kidnapped!

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Dove recaps Sweet Valley High #13: Kidnapped!, a misleading book because 71% of the book is not about a kidnapping. It’s about the value of homework. FFS.

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Sweet Valley High #12: When Love Dies

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Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #12: When Love Dies, and it’s probably a mistake to spend so much time talking about a character dying from cancer. Ah well.

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Sweet Valley High #11: Too Good To Be True

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Raven recaps Sweet Valley High #11: Too Good To Be True, in which we meet a girl who makes Jessica look like Mother Theresa.

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Sweet Valley High #10: Wrong Kind of Girl

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Dove recaps Sweet Valley High #10: Wrong Kind of Girl, where Jessica AGAIN bullies a perfectly nice girl. TRIGGER WARNING: suicide

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