comments by Wing

Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #8: Jessica’s First Kiss

Posted on 11 January 202111 January 2021

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #8: Jessica’s First Kiss, which is pointless because Jessica was kissed in book 15, which was 110 books ago. But this book contains camping! Bears! Vomit! EXCITING, YES?

Sweet Valley Twins #104: Big Brother's In Love Again by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #103: Big Brother’s In Love Again

Posted on 23 November 202023 November 2020

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #103: Big Brother’s In Love Again, in which Steven Wakefield is a Class A copper-plated bobby-dazzling bellend.

Sweet Valley Twins #103: Elizabeth Solves It All

Posted on 16 November 202016 November 2020

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #103: Elizabeth Solves It All, where this Jamie appears to hate Elizabeth as much as Dove does, and Amy Sutton is surprisingly awesome. Yeah, no, really.

Sweet Valley Twins #101: Twins In Love

Posted on 5 October 20205 October 2020

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #101: Twins In Love, in which Elizabeth pretends to be Jessica, Jessica pretends to be Elizabeth, Steven pretends to be a cowboy, and Raven can’t pretend to care.

Sweet Valley Twins #100: If I Die Before I Wake

Posted on 28 September 202028 September 2020

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #100: If I Die Before I Wake. What happens? To quote Alice Wakefield, “I don’t think we’ll ever know the answers…” SERIOUSLY? FUCK YOU!

Sweet Valley Twins #98 – The Beast Is Watching You

Posted on 7 September 202027 September 2020

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #98 – The Beast Is Watching You, in which the noble art of babysitting is examined ad infinitum.

Sweet Valley Twins #97: Too Scared to Sleep

Posted on 31 August 202027 September 2020

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #97: Too Scared to Sleep, the unholy union between Freddy Krueger and Kristy Thomas, where literally nothing happens for 30k words.

Sweet Valley Twins #96: Elizabeth the Spy

Posted on 10 August 202010 August 2020

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #95: Elizabeth the Spy, in which Elizabeth commits perjury in order to secure her supply of thick strawberry milkshakes.

Sweet Valley Twins #95: The Battle of the Cheerleaders by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #95: Battle of the Cheerleaders

Posted on 3 August 20203 August 2020

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #95: Battle of the Cheerleaders, and accidentally enjoys it. Note: it’s not about cheerleading. It’s about basketball. And Dove doesn’t understand that at all.

Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #6: The Twins Take Paris

Posted on 13 July 202013 July 2020

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #6: The Twins Take Paris, in which the twins run away, then run away again. Then run away again. And again.

Sweet Valley Twins #91: Deadly Voyage

Posted on 25 May 202027 September 2020

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #91: Deadly Voyage, in which there’s genuine, terrifying, nail-biting peril. And the best line EVER from Tamara Chase.

Sweet Valley Twins Super Chiller #9: Evil Elizabeth

Posted on 11 May 202011 May 2020

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins Super Chiller #9: Evil Elizabeth where Elizabeth is evil, Steven is useful, Jessica is awesome and Ellen is in character #WINNING

Sweet Valley Twins #89: Jessica’s Cookie Disaster

Posted on 20 April 202020 April 2020

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #89: Jessica’s Cookie Disaster, in which Jessica could have poisoned an entire Home Ec class with a little more dedication.

Sweet Valley Twins #88: Steven Gets Even

Posted on 13 April 202014 December 2020

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #88: Steven Gets Even, and between the girl power and a drive-by spagging, the Mercandy backyard theory becomes canon.

Sweet Valley Twins #87: The Mother-Daughter Switch

Posted on 23 March 202023 March 2020

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #87: The Mother-Daughter Switch, in which the twins play Alice, Elizabeth plays Jessica, and Alice plays a bellend.