Tag: comments by Wing

[Deep blue is Wing’s colour.]

Sweet Valley High #16: Rags to Riches

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Dove recaps Sweet Valley High #16: Rags to Riches, wherein a cute boy becomes rich, and Jessica suddenly wants to date him. And it’s actually better than it sounds.

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Sweet Valley High #13: Kidnapped!

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Dove recaps Sweet Valley High #13: Kidnapped!, a misleading book because 71% of the book is not about a kidnapping. It’s about the value of homework. FFS.

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Sweet Valley High #11: Too Good To Be True

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Raven recaps Sweet Valley High #11: Too Good To Be True, in which we meet a girl who makes Jessica look like Mother Theresa.

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Sweet Valley High #10: Wrong Kind of Girl

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Dove recaps Sweet Valley High #10: Wrong Kind of Girl, where Jessica AGAIN bullies a perfectly nice girl. TRIGGER WARNING: suicide

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Sweet Valley High #8: Heart Breaker

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Raven recaps Sweet Valley High #8: Heart Breaker, in which Bill Chase’s depressing backstory gets him an X Factor audition.

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Sweet Valley High #7: Dear Sister

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Dove recaps Sweet Valley High #7: Dear Sister, wherein Elizabeth is Jessica, Jessica is Elizabeth and the Wakefield parents are literally the worst parents in the world.

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Sweet Valley High #5: All Night Long

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Raven recaps Sweet Valley High #5: All Night Long, in which Jessica is “romanced” by a man with a mustache, and Elizabeth… fails… a… TEST!

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Sweet Valley High #4: Power Play

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Dove recaps Sweet Valley High #4: Power Play and goes BOOM every few paragraphs. Also Liz doesn’t understand sarcasm or metaphors. Seriously.

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Sweet Valley Junior High #1: Get Real

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Dove recaps the absolute best book in the entire Sweet Valley franchise and is shocked to find out that it’s Sweet Valley Junior High #1: Get Real

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Sweet Valley High #2: Secrets

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Dove recaps Sweet Valley High #2: Secrets in which Enid Rollins is the only decent human being

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Sweet Valley High #1: Double Love

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Raven recaps Sweet Valley High #1: Double Love, the first book in the new series… and we’re not in Kansas anymore.

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Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #12: Good-Bye Middle School

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Dove does her last reacap of Sweet Valley Twins, Super Edition #12: Good-Bye Middle School, which has no plot, the characters suck, nothing is resolved and Magical Native Americans die for the Wakefields’ sins. So a fitting cap to the series, all things considered.

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The Unicorn Club #19: The Most Beautiful Girl in the World

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Raven recaps The Unicorn Club #19: The Most Beautiful Girl in the World, in which the Unicorns discover you can be TOO thin, while simultaneously reminding us you can be too fat.

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