Tag: The new girl/boy

It’s amazing how frequently there are new kids joining Sweet Valley Middle School mid-year.

Sweet Valley Twins #112: If Looks Could Kill

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins 112 If Looks Could Kill and a boring set of love triangles becomes an entertaining KILL THEM ALL game. Metaphorically, alas.

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Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #10: The Year Without Christmas

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #10: The Year Without Christmas wherein Jessica relives Christmas Eve over and over and over… and contemplates murdering Amy Sutton

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Sweet Valley Twins #86: It Can’t Happen Here

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #86: It Can’t Happen Here wherein Sweet Valley tackles the Holocaust and the dead rise from the grave. Not hyperbole. #DoveGoesBOOM!

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Sweet Valley Twins Super Chiller #7: The Haunted Burial Ground

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins Super Chiller #7: The Haunted Burial Ground AND DEAR GOD THE CULTURAL APPROPRIATION BULLSHIT.

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Sweet Valley Twins #82: Steven’s Enemy book cover

Sweet Valley Twins #82: Steven’s Enemy

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #82: Steven’s Enemy in which she finds new levels of burning hatred for Steven Wakefield

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Sweet Valley Twins #69: Won't Someone Help Anna by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #69: Won’t Someone Help Anna?

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #69: Won’t Someone Help Anna? There’s a new girl in town, and she’s deaf. BURN HER! BURN THE WITCH!

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Sweet Valley Twins #60: Ciao, Sweet Valley! by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #60: Ciao, Sweet Valley!

Dove recaps the most offensive book in the series to date, Sweet Valley Twins #60: Ciao, Sweet Valley! wherein Jamie Suzanne wants us to really hate Italy. It’s ok though, we just hate the Jamie Suzanne instead.

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Sweet Valley Twins 51: Elizabeth the Impossible by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #51: Elizabeth the Impossible

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #51: Elizabeth the Impossible wherein Elizabeth enters an abusive relationship and changes everything about herself to appease her abuser. Or she gets too big for her boots after winning a few awards. You decide what you think the book’s about.

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Sweet Valley Twins #47: Jessica's New Look by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #47: Jessica’s New Look

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins 47: Jessica’s New Look, wherein Jessica is a boring, self-centred twat who whines a lot about how wearing glasses is LITERALLY THE WORST. No. This book is the worst.

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Sweet Valley Twins 30: Princess Elizabeth by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #30: Princess Elizabeth

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins 30: Princess Elizabeth, in which we learn that the Santa Doran monarchy have incredibly lax security, and that… DOVE LOATHES THE CONCEPT OF MONARCHY.

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Sweet Valley Twins 23: Claim to Fame by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #23: Claim to Fame

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins 23: Claim to Fame, wherein the school inexplicably celebrates being 25 years old by burying a time capsule containing stuff from 25 years ago.

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Sweet Valley Twins 16: Second Best - Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #16: Second Best

Wing Recaps Sweet Valley Twins 16: Second Best. Where brothers dislike each other, and it’s up to busybody Elizabeth to turn them into BFFs.

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