character: Caroline Pearce

A massive gossip. Apparently has no friends, because she only pops up – by herself – whenever gossip needs to be transmitted.

Sweet Valley Twins #85: Elizabeth the Seventh-Grader

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #85: Elizabeth the Seventh-Grader, and Raven is right: Sweet Valley Middle School has the worst teachers in the world. BURN. IT. DOWN.

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SVMS Yearbook Cover 2018

Sweet Valley Middle School Yearbook Superlatives

Raven and Dove never did yearbooks. They never did superlatives. They felt like they missed out. Here are what they came up with…

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Sweet Valley Twins 66: The Great Boyfriend Switch by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #66: The Great Boyfriend Switch

Raven recaps The Great Boyfriend Switch, and needs a spreadsheet to keep track on all the Twinny subterfuge.

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Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #3: The Carnival Ghost by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins Super Chiller #3: The Carnival Ghost

Wing forgot to fill this in, so Dove will summarise: Wing falls hopelessly in love with this awesome story, wherein Liz makes BFFs with a ghost, Lila is sass personified, Jessica is a true believer, and DOVE WAS RIGHT THAT THIS IS THE BEST SWEET VALLEY BOOK EVER.

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Sweet Valley Twins #41: The Twins Get Caught by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #41: The Twins Get Caught

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #41: The Twins Get Caught and resorts to bullet points really damn early because it is not a good time.

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Sweet Valley Twins 37: The War Between the Twins by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #37: The War Between the Twins

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #37: The War Between the Twins, in which Jessica launches a rival newspaper, many lies are told and Amy Sutton can just get in the f***ing sea.

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Sweet Valley Twins 32: Jessica on Stage by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #32: Jessica on Stage

Wing Recaps Sweet Valley Twins #32: Jessica on Stage, wherein Jessica gets mentored by the Sweet Valley equivalent of Doris Day. Because why not?

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Sweet Valley Twins 29: Jessica and the Brat Attack by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #29: Jessica and the Brat Attack

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #29: Jessica and the Brat Attack, wherein Jess faces four children more evil and annoying than herself. And Wing has zero sympathy. It is beautiful.

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Sweet Valley Twins 19: The Bully - Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #19: The Bully

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #19: The Bully, a book which begs the question, “What are the cave’s dimensions?”

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Sweet Valley Twins 18: Center of Attention - Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #18: Center of Attention

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #18: Center of Attention. And she loves it. Massively. We can mock her for this.

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Sweet Valley Twins 15: The Older Boy - Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #15: The Older Boy

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins 15: The Older Boy… and loves it. Despite the easily-apparent squicky idea of a twelve year old dating a sixteen year old, this Jamie Suzanne seems to have pulled it off.

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Sweet Valley Twins #13: Stretching the Truth

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #13: Stretching the Truth, wherein Mary is on her second of three surnames and is feeling very out of sorts, and no adult appears to have noticed.

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Sweet Valley Twins #12: Keeping Secrets

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #12: Keeping Secrets, wherein Ned teaches the girls a secret (and tedious) language and IT TEARS THE SCHOOL APART!

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Sweet Valley Twins #11: Buried Treasure

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #11: Buried Treasure wherein Ellen and Jessica find buried treasure at the exact moment the class money goes missing and conclusions are drawn.

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Sweet Valley Twins 9: Against the Rules

Sweet Valley Twins #9: Against the Rules

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #9: Against the Rules, wherein Elizabeth befriends a poor person. And her parents don’t like it. Can you blame them? You don’t live in Sweet Valley to bump into poor people.

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Sweet Valley Twins 6: The New Girl

Sweet Valley Twins #6: The New Girl

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #6: The New Girl, wherein the twins meet a girl so obnoxious that it creates a triplet named Jennifer. Bullying is fun!

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Sweet Valley Twins 5: Sneaking Out

Sweet Valley Twins #5: Sneaking Out

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #5: Sneaking Out, wherein Jessica nearly kills a dog. And gets rewarded with jewellery.

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