Character: Ken Matthews

Very short basketball player with daddy issues and a Napoleon complex. As intelligent as plywood. Amy’s love interest. (Spoiler: goes “fatally” blind in one SVH book, but gets better.)

Sweet Valley Twins #95: Battle of the Cheerleaders

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #95: Battle of the Cheerleaders, and accidentally enjoys it. Note: it’s not about cheerleading. It’s about basketball. And Dove doesn’t understand that at all.

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Sweet Valley Twins #91: Deadly Voyage

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #91: Deadly Voyage, in which there’s genuine, terrifying, nail-biting peril. And the best line EVER from Tamara Chase.

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Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #5: Lila’s Secret Valentine

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #5: Lila’s Secret Valentine, in which Lila falls for a bit of rough, and Todd Wilkins is completely insufferable.

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Sweet Valley Twins #76: Yours for a Day by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #76: Yours for a Day

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #76: Yours for a Day, and is way too charmed by a made-up holiday focused on pink romance.

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SVMS Yearbook Cover 2018

Sweet Valley Middle School Yearbook Superlatives

Raven and Dove never did yearbooks. They never did superlatives. They felt like they missed out. Here are what they came up with…

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Sweet Valley Twins 66: The Great Boyfriend Switch by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #66: The Great Boyfriend Switch

Raven recaps The Great Boyfriend Switch, and needs a spreadsheet to keep track on all the Twinny subterfuge.

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Sweet Valley Twins 62: Sarah’s Dad and Sophia’s Mom by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #62: Sarah’s Dad and Sophia’s Mum

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #62: Sarah’s Dad and Sophia’s Mum and is both annoyed and bored. How? How is that even possible? All these great tropes and yet the story is terrible.

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Sweet Valley Twins 54: The Big Party Weekend by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #54: The Big Party Weekend

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #54: The Big Party Weekend, wherein the Wakefield siblings hold a super-cool party while their parents are off their boxes on disco biscuits.

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Sweet Valley Twins 52: Booster Boycott by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #52: Booster Boycott

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #52: Booster Boycott and burns everything to the fucking ground. Fuck gender essentialism. Fuck heteronormativity. Fuck Wakefields Must Win.

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Sweet Valley Twins 43: Elizabeth’s First Kiss, by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #43: Elizabeth’s First Kiss

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #43: Elizabet’s First Kiss, which sees Elizabeth lose her lip virginity to the inestimable Todd Wilkins… or does she?

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Sweet Valley Twins #35: Amy's Pen Pal by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #35: Amy’s Pen Pal

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins 35: Amy’s Pen Pal, in which Amy Sutton loses a new friend to siren call of the Unigibbons. Will they steal her friend forever?

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Sweet Valley Twins 32: Jessica on Stage by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #32: Jessica on Stage

Wing Recaps Sweet Valley Twins #32: Jessica on Stage, wherein Jessica gets mentored by the Sweet Valley equivalent of Doris Day. Because why not?

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Jessica vs Elizabeth (The Hunger Games) by Dove

NaNoWriMo2017: Jessica vs Elizabeth – Chapter 9

Dove continues to NaNo, this time with a really long chapter of pre-Hunger Games interviews, hosted by Beau Dillon and Johnny Buck!

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Sweet Valley Twins 29: Jessica and the Brat Attack by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #29: Jessica and the Brat Attack

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #29: Jessica and the Brat Attack, wherein Jess faces four children more evil and annoying than herself. And Wing has zero sympathy. It is beautiful.

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Sweet Valley Twins 27: Teamwork by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #27: Teamwork

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #27: Teamwork, in which a dog gets a bad dye job and Ken Matthews doesn’t get paid for his hard work. Oh, and the twins exist.

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Sweet Valley Twins 19: The Bully - Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #19: The Bully

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #19: The Bully, a book which begs the question, “What are the cave’s dimensions?”

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Sweet Valley Twins #11: Buried Treasure

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #11: Buried Treasure wherein Ellen and Jessica find buried treasure at the exact moment the class money goes missing and conclusions are drawn.

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Sweet Valley Twins #4: Choosing Sides

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #4: Choosing Sides, wherein Amy wants to twirl a baton, Jessica doesn’t want her to, and Elizabeth feebly stands in the middle, wondering whose side to take.

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