Sweet Valley Online

Sweet Valley Twins #112: If Looks Could Kill

Posted on 12 April 202112 April 2021 by Wing

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins 112 If Looks Could Kill and a boring set of love triangles becomes an entertaining KILL THEM ALL game. Metaphorically, alas.

Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #10: The Year Without Christmas

Posted on 5 April 20215 April 2021 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #10: The Year Without Christmas wherein Jessica relives Christmas Eve over and over and over… and contemplates murdering Amy Sutton

Sweet Valley Twins #111: Sisters at War

Posted on 22 March 202122 March 2021 by Raven

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #111: Sisters at War, and wishes that time travel was a thing, so he could rewind to the day before he read it.

Sweet Valley Twins #110: Pumpkin Fever

Posted on 15 March 202115 March 2021 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins 110: Pumpkin Fever in which Jessica wants to be crowned Halloween Queen, and will stop at nothing to achieve it, including murdering a fictional squirrel!

Sweet Valley Twins #109: Don’t Go Into the Basement

Posted on 8 March 202114 March 2021 by Wing

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #109: Don’t Go into the Basement and there’s some sleuthing afoot.

Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #9: The Twins Go To College

Posted on 22 February 202122 February 2021 by Raven

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #9: The Twins Go To College, in which there’s so much inappropriate grooming it might as well be called Sweet Valley Lolita.

Sweet Valley Twins #108: Cammi’s Crush

Posted on 15 February 202115 February 2021 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #108: Cammi’s Crush, which is a Sweet Valley retelling of Emma/Clueless and… it’s actually awesome

Sweet Valley Twins #107: The Twins Hit Hollywood

Posted on 8 February 202110 April 2021 by Wing

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins 107 The Twins Hit Hollywood and there’s a whole lot of shaking going on. And by shaking, she means pranking and boredom.

Sweet Valley Twins #106: Breakfast of Enemies

Posted on 25 January 202110 April 2021 by Raven

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #106: Breakfast of Enemies, in which the sass is electric, the cereal is inedible, and Jessica needs to have a word with herself.

Sweet Valley Twins #105 Jessica’s Lucky Millions

Posted on 18 January 202125 February 2021 by Wing

Wing (@devilselbowpod) recaps Sweet Valley Twins #105 Jessica’s Lucky Millions and is fairly eh over it all. More on her than the treasure hunt or the sibling prank war. Again.

Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #8: Jessica’s First Kiss

Posted on 11 January 202111 January 2021 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #8: Jessica’s First Kiss, which is pointless because Jessica was kissed in book 15, which was 110 books ago. But this book contains camping! Bears! Vomit! EXCITING, YES?

We’re taking December off

Posted on 7 December 20205 December 2020 by Dove

Just letting you know we’re taking a break and will be back on 4 Jan 2021.

Sweet Valley Twins #103: Big Brother’s In Love Again

Posted on 23 November 202025 February 2021 by Raven

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #103: Big Brother’s In Love Again, in which Steven Wakefield is a Class A copper-plated bobby-dazzling bellend.

Sweet Valley Twins #103: Elizabeth Solves It All

Posted on 16 November 202025 February 2021 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #103: Elizabeth Solves It All, where this Jamie appears to hate Elizabeth as much as Dove does, and Amy Sutton is surprisingly awesome. Yeah, no, really.

Sweet Valley Twins #102: The Mysterious Dr Q

Posted on 2 November 20201 November 2020 by Wing

Wing recaps The Mysterious Dr. Q and no. just no. no to the infinite power.

Sweet Valley Twins #101: Twins In Love

Posted on 5 October 202010 April 2021 by Raven

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #101: Twins In Love, in which Elizabeth pretends to be Jessica, Jessica pretends to be Elizabeth, Steven pretends to be a cowboy, and Raven can’t pretend to care.

Sweet Valley Twins #100: If I Die Before I Wake

Posted on 28 September 202025 February 2021 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #100: If I Die Before I Wake. What happens? To quote Alice Wakefield, “I don’t think we’ll ever know the answers…” SERIOUSLY? FUCK YOU!

Sweet Valley Twins #99: The Beast Must Die

Posted on 21 September 202025 February 2021 by Wing

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins 99: The Beast Must Die and hates everything. Mostly because of what’s going on in the world, but also the book sucks.

Sweet Valley Twins #98 – The Beast Is Watching You

Posted on 7 September 202027 September 2020 by Raven

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #98 – The Beast Is Watching You, in which the noble art of babysitting is examined ad infinitum.

Sweet Valley Twins #97: Too Scared to Sleep

Posted on 31 August 202025 February 2021 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #97: Too Scared to Sleep, the unholy union between Freddy Krueger and Kristy Thomas, where literally nothing happens for 30k words.