Sweet Valley Online

A brief hiatus

Posted on 9 January 20228 January 2022 by Dove

We are taking a brief hiatus from recapping. We will update with a return date once we’ve sorted one out.

The Unicorn Club #12: Five Girls and a Baby

Posted on 20 December 202120 December 2021 by Dove

Title: Five Girls and a Baby Tagline: The baby-sitting job that won’t end Summary: When my friends in the Unicorn

The Unicorn Club #11: Angels Keep Out

Posted on 13 December 202113 December 2021 by Wing

Title: Angels Keep Out Tagline: Playing dirty… [Wing: Where’s Nydick? He’d be thrilled with this.] Summary: Guess what the Angels

The Unicorn Club #10: Mandy In The Middle

Posted on 6 December 20216 December 2021 by Raven

Raven recaps The Unicorn Club #10: Mandy In The Middle, in which Mandy is obsessed with Randall, Lila is obsessed with Mandy, and Raven is obsessed with the word count.

The Unicorn Club #9: Ellen’s Family Secret

Posted on 22 November 202125 November 2021 by Dove

Dove recaps The Unicorn Club #9: Ellen’s Family Secret, wherein Ellen tries to Parent Trap her feuding parents without anyone finding out and asks probing questions such as: What Would Jessica Do? and Do the Fowlers’ servants ever get a day off?

The Unicorn Club #8: Kimberly Rides Again

Posted on 16 November 202116 November 2021 by Wing

Title: Kimberly Rides Again Tagline: The Unicorns hit the trail! Summary: Guess what? Just when the Unicorns were finally back

The Unicorn Club #7: Too Close for Comfort

Posted on 8 November 202125 November 2021 by Raven

Raven recaps The Unicorn Club #7: Too Close for Comfort, and wishes he’d spent his time doing LITERALLY anything else.

The Unicorn Club #6: Unicorns at War (Super Edition)

Posted on 25 October 202125 November 2021 by Dove

Dove recaps The Unicorn Club #6: Unicorns at War (Super Edition) which is a rehash of Tug of War if blank-page Bella from Twilight was a main character #NotMyMandy

The Unicorn Club #5: Unicorns in Love

Posted on 19 October 202125 November 2021 by Wing

Title: Unicorns In Love Tagline: Blinded by love… Summary: The Unicorns are over… finished for good. But this time we

The Unicorn Club #4: Lila’s Little Sister

Posted on 12 October 202125 November 2021 by Raven

Raven recaps The Unicorn Club #4: Lila’s Little Sister, in which Lila Fowler’s life is upended by a four-year-old spawn of pure evil.

Delay To Our Scheduled Programming

Posted on 11 October 202111 October 2021 by Raven

Today’s scheduled recap will be 24 hours late, for reasons. Come join us on Tuesday!

The Unicorn Club #3: The Best Friend Game

Posted on 27 September 202125 November 2021 by Raven

Title: The Best Friend Game Tagline: Winner take all… Summary: Can you believe there’s a new club at Sweet Valley

The Unicorn Club #2: Maria’s Movie Comeback

Posted on 21 September 202125 November 2021 by Wing

Wing recaps The Unicorn Club #2: Maria’s Move Comeback and actually there’s some amazing character work and friendships while Maria stresses the hell out in a super sympathetic way.

The Unicorn Club #1: Save the Unicorns!

Posted on 6 September 202125 November 2021 by Dove

Dove recaps Save the Unicorns! and cannot stop gushing about how bloody fantastic it is, we have daring flood rescues, fabulous parties and righteous demonstrations, not to mention great girl friendships!

Team Sweet Valley #2: Win One For Sandra

Posted on 12 July 202112 July 2021 by Dove

Dove recaps Team Sweet Valley #2: Win One For Sandra and loathes every second of it, with special shout-out to Elizabeth-behaving-as-Jessica and Supah Speshul Sandra, not to mention the incomprehensible layout of where these games take place.

Team Sweet Valley #1: Jessica Goes for Gold

Posted on 5 July 20215 July 2021 by Wing

Wing recaps Team Sweet Valley #1: Jessica Goes for the Gold and it fails completely at being a sports book BUT ROCKS AT BEING AN ENEMIES TO FRIENDS (TO LOVERS) BOOK.

Sweet Valley Twins #118: No Escape!

Posted on 21 June 202121 June 2021 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #118: No Escape!, the last in the main SVT series – where Mr Seigel is crowned GOD OF TERRIBLE TEACHERS and Dove becomes Team Elizabeth in response.

Sweet Valley Twins #117: Down With Queen Janet!

Posted on 14 June 202127 June 2021 by Raven

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #117: Down With Queen Janet, in which Janet Howell does a very passible impersonation of Kyle’s Mom.

Sweet Valley Twins #116: Jessica Takes Charge

Posted on 7 June 20214 September 2021 by Wing

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #116 Jessica Takes Charge and is shocked when the book touches on racist institutions and social injustice without completely handwaving it off.

Episode 36: The Unicorns Go Hawaiian

Posted on 31 May 202131 May 2021 by Raven

Wing, Raven and Dove talk about Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition 4: The Unicorns Go Hawaiian. They also discuss Bleak Valley and how the book ties into this theory.