Character: Maria Slater

Former child star, close friend of Elizabeth – quite often has something to do outside of her own book. Probably the only African-American in Sweet Valley. Oddly for its time and the scary Aryan nature of genetics in Sweet Valley, this is not a big deal. I’m amazed.

Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #12: Good-Bye Middle School

Dove does her last reacap of Sweet Valley Twins, Super Edition #12: Good-Bye Middle School, which has no plot, the characters suck, nothing is resolved and Magical Native Americans die for the Wakefields’ sins. So a fitting cap to the series, all things considered.

Continue reading
Cover of The Unicorn Club #11 Angels Keep Out

The Unicorn Club #11: Angels Keep Out

Title: Angels Keep Out Tagline: Playing dirty… [Wing: Where’s Nydick? He’d be thrilled with this.] Summary: Guess what the Angels

Continue reading
The Unicorn Club 6: The Unicorns at War

The Unicorn Club #6: Unicorns at War (Super Edition)

Dove recaps The Unicorn Club #6: Unicorns at War (Super Edition) which is a rehash of Tug of War if blank-page Bella from Twilight was a main character #NotMyMandy

Continue reading
The Unicorn Club 5: Unicorns in Love

The Unicorn Club #5: Unicorns in Love

Title: Unicorns In Love Tagline: Blinded by love… Summary: The Unicorns are over… finished for good. But this time we

Continue reading
The Unicorn Club 4: Lila's Little Sister

The Unicorn Club #4: Lila’s Little Sister

Raven recaps The Unicorn Club #4: Lila’s Little Sister, in which Lila Fowler’s life is upended by a four-year-old spawn of pure evil.

Continue reading
The Unicorn Club 2: Maria's Movie Comeback

The Unicorn Club #2: Maria’s Movie Comeback

Wing recaps The Unicorn Club #2: Maria’s Move Comeback and actually there’s some amazing character work and friendships while Maria stresses the hell out in a super sympathetic way.

Continue reading
The Unicorn Club 1: Save the Unicorns

The Unicorn Club #1: Save the Unicorns!

Dove recaps Save the Unicorns! and cannot stop gushing about how bloody fantastic it is, we have daring flood rescues, fabulous parties and righteous demonstrations, not to mention great girl friendships!

Continue reading

Team Sweet Valley #2: Win One For Sandra

Dove recaps Team Sweet Valley #2: Win One For Sandra and loathes every second of it, with special shout-out to Elizabeth-behaving-as-Jessica and Supah Speshul Sandra, not to mention the incomprehensible layout of where these games take place.

Continue reading

Sweet Valley Twins #118: No Escape!

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #118: No Escape!, the last in the main SVT series – where Mr Seigel is crowned GOD OF TERRIBLE TEACHERS and Dove becomes Team Elizabeth in response.

Continue reading

Sweet Valley Twins #114: The Boyfriend Mess

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #114: The Boyfriend Mess and there are love triangles, miscommunications, and dating shenanigans everywhere. EVERYWHERE.

Continue reading

Sweet Valley Twins #113: The Boyfriend Game

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #113: The Boyfriend Game, which pays homage to a legendary Eighties television gameshow, in a frankly incomprehensible way.

Continue reading

Sweet Valley Twins #112: If Looks Could Kill

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins 112 If Looks Could Kill and a boring set of love triangles becomes an entertaining KILL THEM ALL game. Metaphorically, alas.

Continue reading

Sweet Valley Twins #110: Pumpkin Fever

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins 110: Pumpkin Fever in which Jessica wants to be crowned Halloween Queen, and will stop at nothing to achieve it, including murdering a fictional squirrel!

Continue reading

Sweet Valley Twins #103: Elizabeth Solves It All

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #103: Elizabeth Solves It All, where this Jamie appears to hate Elizabeth as much as Dove does, and Amy Sutton is surprisingly awesome. Yeah, no, really.

Continue reading

Sweet Valley Twins #94: Don’t Talk to Brian

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #93: Don’t Talk to Brian wherein Brian the Nazi is redeemed. Wing takes this about as well as you’d think.

Continue reading

Sweet Valley Twins #91: Deadly Voyage

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #91: Deadly Voyage, in which there’s genuine, terrifying, nail-biting peril. And the best line EVER from Tamara Chase.

Continue reading