RIP Francine Pascal
Francine Pascal passed away on 28 July 2024. Dove does her best at reacting to this.
Continue readingEvil triplets snarkily recap Sweet Valley Twins, High, University, Confidential & Sweet Life
Francine Pascal passed away on 28 July 2024. Dove does her best at reacting to this.
Continue readingDove recaps Sweet Valley High #28: Alone in the Crowd, wherein Lynne Henry wallows in self-loathing, writes a song, and falls in love. Also, there’s rocking chairs. [Note: Also, some of Dove’s ebook is missing, apparently.]
Continue readingDove recaps Sweet Valley High #26: Hostage!, which features hostages, daring rescues, useless police, and… random shit about Ken Matthews failing English.
Continue readingDove recaps Sweet Valley High Super Editions #2: Special Christmas wherein the specialness is ranked by how many whispered conversations the Wakefields can have about Suzanne Devlin.
Continue readingDove recaps Sweet Valley High Super Edition #1: Perfect Summer, where most of the action is off screen but it makes up for it with 240 pages of dish washing.
Continue readingDove recaps Sweet Valley High #19: Showdown the age-old story of two girls fighting over a boy. Who tries to kill one of them.
Continue readingDove recaps Sweet Valley High #16: Rags to Riches, wherein a cute boy becomes rich, and Jessica suddenly wants to date him. And it’s actually better than it sounds.
Continue readingDove recaps Sweet Valley High #13: Kidnapped!, a misleading book because 71% of the book is not about a kidnapping. It’s about the value of homework. FFS.
Continue readingDove recaps Sweet Valley High #10: Wrong Kind of Girl, where Jessica AGAIN bullies a perfectly nice girl. TRIGGER WARNING: suicide
Continue readingDove recaps Sweet Valley High #7: Dear Sister, wherein Elizabeth is Jessica, Jessica is Elizabeth and the Wakefield parents are literally the worst parents in the world.
Continue readingDove recaps Sweet Valley High #4: Power Play and goes BOOM every few paragraphs. Also Liz doesn’t understand sarcasm or metaphors. Seriously.
Continue readingCover Calypso! A game where Dove invites Raven and Wing to judge a book by its cover!
Continue readingDove recaps the absolute best book in the entire Sweet Valley franchise and is shocked to find out that it’s Sweet Valley Junior High #1: Get Real
Continue readingCover Calypso! A game where Dove invites Raven and Wing to judge a book by its cover!
Continue readingDove recaps Sweet Valley High #2: Secrets in which Enid Rollins is the only decent human being
Continue readingCover Calypso! A game where Dove invites Raven and Wing to judge a book by its cover!
Continue readingCover Calypso! A game where Dove invites Raven and Wing to judge a book by its cover!
Continue readingDove does her last reacap of Sweet Valley Twins, Super Edition #12: Good-Bye Middle School, which has no plot, the characters suck, nothing is resolved and Magical Native Americans die for the Wakefields’ sins. So a fitting cap to the series, all things considered.
Continue readingDove recaps The Unicorn Club #21: Snow Bunnies, a book so infuriating that even a mountain loses patience it.
Continue readingDove recaps The Unicorn Club #17: Rachel’s In, Lila’s Out and fixates on the one throwaway line that there are 75 rooms in Fowler Crest. That’s tells you all you need to know about how good the plot is.
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