Character: Elizabeth Wakefield

Most perfect human being on the planet. How would life go on without her?

Sweet Valley High #4: Power Play

Dove recaps Sweet Valley High #4: Power Play and goes BOOM every few paragraphs. Also Liz doesn’t understand sarcasm or metaphors. Seriously.

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Sweet Valley High #3: Playing With Fire

Wing recaps Sweet Valley High #3: Playing With Fire and three books in, she’s burning Sweet Valley to the ground.

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Sweet Valley High #2: Secrets

Dove recaps Sweet Valley High #2: Secrets in which Enid Rollins is the only decent human being

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Sweet Valley High #1: Double Love

Raven recaps Sweet Valley High #1: Double Love, the first book in the new series… and we’re not in Kansas anymore.

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Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #12: Good-Bye Middle School

Dove does her last reacap of Sweet Valley Twins, Super Edition #12: Good-Bye Middle School, which has no plot, the characters suck, nothing is resolved and Magical Native Americans die for the Wakefields’ sins. So a fitting cap to the series, all things considered.

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Cover of The Unicorn Club #11 Angels Keep Out

The Unicorn Club #11: Angels Keep Out

Title: Angels Keep Out Tagline: Playing dirty… [Wing: Where’s Nydick? He’d be thrilled with this.] Summary: Guess what the Angels

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The Unicorn Club 6: The Unicorns at War

The Unicorn Club #6: Unicorns at War (Super Edition)

Dove recaps The Unicorn Club #6: Unicorns at War (Super Edition) which is a rehash of Tug of War if blank-page Bella from Twilight was a main character #NotMyMandy

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The Unicorn Club 5: Unicorns in Love

The Unicorn Club #5: Unicorns in Love

Title: Unicorns In Love Tagline: Blinded by love… Summary: The Unicorns are over… finished for good. But this time we

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The Unicorn Club 4: Lila's Little Sister

The Unicorn Club #4: Lila’s Little Sister

Raven recaps The Unicorn Club #4: Lila’s Little Sister, in which Lila Fowler’s life is upended by a four-year-old spawn of pure evil.

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The Unicorn Club 2: Maria's Movie Comeback

The Unicorn Club #2: Maria’s Movie Comeback

Wing recaps The Unicorn Club #2: Maria’s Move Comeback and actually there’s some amazing character work and friendships while Maria stresses the hell out in a super sympathetic way.

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The Unicorn Club 1: Save the Unicorns

The Unicorn Club #1: Save the Unicorns!

Dove recaps Save the Unicorns! and cannot stop gushing about how bloody fantastic it is, we have daring flood rescues, fabulous parties and righteous demonstrations, not to mention great girl friendships!

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Team Sweet Valley #2: Win One For Sandra

Dove recaps Team Sweet Valley #2: Win One For Sandra and loathes every second of it, with special shout-out to Elizabeth-behaving-as-Jessica and Supah Speshul Sandra, not to mention the incomprehensible layout of where these games take place.

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