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Book-long BFF: Kala

Sweet Valley Twins Super Chiller #7: The Haunted Burial Ground

Posted on 20 January 202025 February 2021 by Wing

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins Super Chiller #7: The Haunted Burial Ground AND DEAR GOD THE CULTURAL APPROPRIATION BULLSHIT.

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Super Chillers
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  Halloween, Houses for the Homeless, Party: Halloween
  Amy Sutton, Bruce Patman, Elizabeth Wakefield, Ellen Riteman, Janet Howell, Jessica Wakefield, Joe (aka "Sam") Howell, Lila Fowler, Mandy Miller, Maria Slater, Mary Giaccio-Robinson-Wallace, Rick Hunter, Steven Wakefield
  Jessica Wakefield/Scott
  Kala
  Singing

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About

Evil twins, Wing (she/her) and Dove (she/her), trade Point Horror for Sweet Valley. And they have a secret triplet, Raven (he/him), joining them for a dude’s point of view.

We will be recapping Sweet Valley Twins (and all the special editions, including The Unicorn Club) to start with, and if Wing survives that, we may try other Sweet Valley series.

We upload every week for three weeks, and take a week off. We upload the recap on Monday, and the podcast the following weekend.

Our next recap will be Sweet Valley High #18: Head Over Heels (Wing on 6 Feb 2023) .

Our Podcast music is provided by Stuart Taylor of Legacy Breakfast.

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Raven’s Twinparisons

Elizabeth spends her spare time reading. Jessica spend her spare time listening to the police scanner, desperately hoping her primary burial site remains undetected.

Jessica loves talking about fashion. Elizabeth wears sack-cloth and daubs her face with ashes, which she believes brings her closer to God (in this case, Mr Bowman).

Jessica has many friends, members of the fabled Unicorn Club. Elizabeth surrounds herself with sycophants, and is so lonely her only release is a twice-weekly frot with a battered stuffed koala.

Sweet Valley Twins #69: Won’t Someone Help Anna?

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#BestJamieSuzanne #TeamGrapplegate A+ parenting Always With the Incest Bleak Valley aka Sweet Valley Low Book-long soulmates comments by Dove comments by Raven comments by Wing Dance Baby Dance Don't be a bully be a star Double Dipping Plot Dove goes BOOM! Elizabeth Has A Spine! Ewww poor people! For the hundred and thirty-seventh time... FUCK YOU TAMARA CHASE Great Ghosties I'm running away! I'm scared of Jessica I HATE STEVEN Jessica's New Fave Hobby lo! a haunted house Needs More Werewolves No means no - unless you're Jessica Plucky girl detectives Poor little Jessica Raven disapproves of the faculty Raven goes BOOM Shame you're not a perfect size 6 sketchy student-teacher relationships Something Must Be Done SUPERNATURAL OOOOH Sweet Valley Time THANK GOD FOR ELIZABETH That brand new tradition we've always had The new girl/boy The tears of a saint The twins CANNOT sing The twins CAN sing too many Peters TWIN MAGIC Wakefields Must Win Wing's heart grew 10 sizes Wing goes BOOM

Characters

Aaron Dallas (21) Alice Wakefield (78) Amy Sutton (88) Belinda "Billie" Layton (17) Betsy Gordon (6) Brooke Dennis (10) Bruce Patman (49) Caroline Pearce (23) Cathy Connors (7) Charlie Cashman (9) Denny Jacobson (7) Elizabeth Wakefield (193) Ellen Riteman (86) Evie Kim (7) George Fowler (8) Grace Oliver (10) Janet Howell (71) Jerry McAllister (12) Jessica Wakefield (201) Joe (aka "Sam") Howell (13) Johnny Buck (7) Julie Porter (16) Ken Matthews (22) Kimberly Haver (30) Lila Fowler (140) Lois Waller (24) Mandy Miller (58) Maria Slater (32) Mary Giaccio-Robinson-Wallace (33) Melissa McCormick (9) Mr Bowman (14) Mr Clark (7) Mr Nydick (8) Mrs Arnette (8) Ms Wyler (8) Ned Wakefield (55) Nora Mercandy (8) Olivia Davidson (8) Rick Hunter (14) Sarah Thomas (6) Sophia Rizzo (13) Steven Wakefield (92) Tamara Chase (14) Todd Wilkins (39) Winston Egbert (33)

Elizabeth’s BFF

Amy Sutton (5) Anna Barrett (1) Arthur Castle aka Castillo (1) Belinda "Billie" Layton (1) Betsy Martin (2) Brian Boyd (1) Brooke Dennis (3) Cammi Adams (1) Chrissy Steele (1) Christoph Bachmann (1) Danny Jackson (1) Denny Jacobson (but not through choice) (1) Dylan McKay (1) George Henkel (1) Ginny Lu Culpepper (1) Grace Oliver (1) Joe Carrey (1) Kala (1) Ken Matthews (2) Leslie Forsythe (1) Lila Fowler (2) Lois Waller (2) Lucy Benson (1) Mandy Miller (1) Maria Slater (3) Mary Giaccio-Robinson-Wallace (3) Melissa McCormick (1) Miranda Page (1) Nora Mercandy (1) Pamela Jacobson (1) Pamela McDonald (1) Patrick Morris (1) Poor disabled and homeless Benjamin (1) Robin (Wakefield?) (3) Robin Wilson (1) Samantha Williams (1) Sam Sloane (1) Sandra Ferris (1) Sarah Thomas (1) Sophia Rizzo (1) Starr Johnson (1) The (homeless) Glass family (1) Winston Egbert (1)

Jessica’s Hobby

Acting (10) Baby-Sitting (5) Ballet (1) Basketball (2) Becoming a lawyer (1) Being a Bag of Dicks (1) Being a Big Sister (1) Being Famous (1) Being Jailbait (2) Being psychic (4) Being the good twin (1) Being treated like a grownup (3) Candy Striping (1) Caring about the disabled (2) Catching Criminals (2) Ceramics (1) Changing Herself for a Boy (1) Cheerleading (5) Comedy (1) Dogs (yes really) (1) Fashion Designer (1) France (1) Gymnastics (1) Having her picture taken (1) Horse Riding (1) House-Sitting (1) Hypnosis (1) Intellectual Property Theft (1) Ithig (1) Lying (1) Modelling (1) Murder (1) Re-living Days (1) Running a Student Paper (1) Saving the Environment (2) Seals (1) Singing (6) Skiing (1) Softball (1) Solving Mysteries (1) Student Council (1) Surfing (1) Treasure Hunting (1) Unabashed EEEVIL (2) Using her evil powers of scheming for good (3)
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