Tag: Book-long soulmates

Elizabeth has spotted a new potential BFF-for-a-book. Like, they’re not as cool as Amy, but Amy’s so boring, because she hasn’t got any problems Liz can fix, so they’ve agreed to BFF other people for a book, because Liz needs an exciting BFF with a bucket of angst that Liz can pour away while smiling beatifically.

Sweet Valley Twins #96: Elizabeth the Spy

Posted on 10 August 20201 July 2021 by Raven

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #95: Elizabeth the Spy, in which Elizabeth commits perjury in order to secure her supply of thick strawberry milkshakes.

Sweet Valley Twins #94: Don’t Talk to Brian

Posted on 27 July 202023 April 2023 by Wing

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #93: Don’t Talk to Brian wherein Brian the Nazi is redeemed. Wing takes this about as well as you’d think.

Sweet Valley Twins #90: The Cousin War

Posted on 4 May 202025 February 2021 by Wing

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins 90: The Cousin War and it is love octagon farce in the most delightful ways.

Sweet Valley Twins #83: Amy’s Secret Sister

Posted on 28 January 202028 January 2020 by Raven

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #83: Amy’s Secret Sister, in which Amy v2.0 charms everyone in a thirty mile radius.

Sweet Valley Twins Super Chiller #7: The Haunted Burial Ground

Posted on 20 January 202025 February 2021 by Wing

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins Super Chiller #7: The Haunted Burial Ground AND DEAR GOD THE CULTURAL APPROPRIATION BULLSHIT.

Episode 34: The Slime That Ate Sweet Valley

Posted on 30 September 20196 November 2019 by Raven

Wing, Raven and Dove talk about Sweet Valley Twins 53: The Slime That Ate Sweet Valley. They also discuss Bleak Valley and how the book ties into this theory.

Sweet Valley Twins #69: Won’t Someone Help Anna?

Posted on 17 December 201825 February 2021 by Raven

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #69: Won’t Someone Help Anna? There’s a new girl in town, and she’s deaf. BURN HER! BURN THE WITCH!

Sweet Valley Twins #58: Elizabeth and the Orphans

Posted on 20 August 201821 February 2021 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #58: Elizabeth and the Orphans wherein Melissa and Andy McCormick lose their mother and it’s actually quite sad, and Elizabeth does very little, except show up every few pages to remind us that she exists.

Sweet Valley Twins #55: Brooke and her Rock-Star Mom

Posted on 23 July 201818 March 2020 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #55: Brooke and her Rock-Star Mom wherein Coco, the newest hottest star, is a genuinely awful parent, allows her employee to abuse her daughter, and actively teaches her daughter to keep secrets from her father.

Sweet Valley Twins #53: The Slime That Ate Sweet Valley

Posted on 25 June 201825 February 2021 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #53: The Slime That Ate Sweet Valley wherein she over-identifies with a nerd, keeps saying Smooze instead of “the Slime” and Jessica’s first kiss gets revoked.

Sweet Valley Twins #51: Elizabeth the Impossible

Posted on 4 June 201828 June 2018 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #51: Elizabeth the Impossible wherein Elizabeth enters an abusive relationship and changes everything about herself to appease her abuser. Or she gets too big for her boots after winning a few awards. You decide what you think the book’s about.

Sweet Valley Twins #45: Lucy Takes the Reins

Posted on 9 April 201821 February 2021 by Dove

Dove recaps Lucy Takes the Reins, wherein Dove doesn’t care in the slightest about Lucy, but ADORES WHOLEHEARTEDLY the b-plot, which features #BestJess

Sweet Valley Twins #40: Danny Means Trouble

Posted on 5 February 201828 June 2018 by Dove

Dove slugs her way through another Very Special Episode during which she wants to murder Elizabeth. More than usual.

Sweet Valley Twins #31: Jessica’s Bad Idea

Posted on 30 October 20176 February 2021 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins 31: Jessica’s Bad Idea, in which the most loathesome creature on the planet goes toe-to-toe with… Jessica? Yes. There is someone *worse* than Jess in Sweet Valley.

Sweet Valley Twins #30: Princess Elizabeth

Posted on 16 October 201728 June 2018 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins 30: Princess Elizabeth, in which we learn that the Santa Doran monarchy have incredibly lax security, and that… DOVE LOATHES THE CONCEPT OF MONARCHY.

Sweet Valley Twins #27: Teamwork

Posted on 18 September 201723 April 2023 by Wing

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #27: Teamwork, in which a dog gets a bad dye job and Ken Matthews doesn’t get paid for his hard work. Oh, and the twins exist.

Sweet Valley Twins #26: Taking Charge

Posted on 11 September 201723 April 2023 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins 26: Taking Charge, in which the b-plot is the most compelling thing, because it doesn’t require an iron grip on the idiot ball.

Sweet Valley Twins #25: Standing Out

Posted on 28 August 201723 April 2023 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins 25: Standing Out, in which Billie Layton has to deal with getting her period, liking boys, and having her shitbag parents steal her name and give it to their new child.

Sweet Valley Twins #23: Claim to Fame

Posted on 31 July 201723 April 2023 by Raven

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins 23: Claim to Fame, wherein the school inexplicably celebrates being 25 years old by burying a time capsule containing stuff from 25 years ago.

Sweet Valley Twins #22: Out of Place

Posted on 24 July 201723 April 2023 by Dove

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins 22: Out of Place. Once again the harpies of Sweet Valley decide to bully a new student to the point of suicide, and somehow that’s ok.