Title: Angels Keep Out
Tagline: Playing dirty… [Wing: Where’s Nydick? He’d be thrilled with this.]
Summary: Guess what the Angels have done now! The Unicorns are throwing the hottest boy-girl party of the year, and the Angels have gone and planned one for the same night! And on top of that, they’re trying to steal our guests and our cool ideas. (Don’t listen to them when they say the same thing about us. They’re lying)
I didn’t want to play dirty, but the Angels aren’t giving us any choice. Whatever it takes, we’re going to make sure that the Unicorn party is the only party that anyone who’s anyone goes to—anyone but the Angels, that is. Maybe the Angels will finally learn their lesson:
Don’t try competing with a Unicorn.
The Unicorns are back and better than ever!
The ongoing conflict between the Angels and the Unicorn Club Classic Version exhausts me. This is not what the first few books promised, and I am tired of it. Even worse, I’m bored. I don’t care about their disagreements, I don’t care about Kimberly and her obsession with the cruel version of the Unicorn Club, I don’t care about many of the character choices in this series, I don’t really care about the series itself at this point.
That bodes well.
[Dove: I never thought I’d say this, but I’m quite excited to see the return of Team Boring. I keep hoping that they’ll reunite and the various personalities will play off each other, giving us interesting stories for the rest of the series, rather than “four stuck-up shopaholics do something vapid and one is even more spiteful than the other three”. So, hi Team Boring. I can’t believe this, but I’ve missed you. Let’s see how long this lasts.]
[Raven: I was enjoying this subseries. then Kimberly Haver returned and ruined everything. Fuck Kimberly Haver, and fuck this subseries.]
Jessica book! She’s playing checkers with Gabriella at the Sweet Valley Child Care Center, and she’s eaten enough graham crackers that they’re almost out. That’s not the only thing: juice, glasses, cleaning supplies, you name it, they’re running out of it.
Lila says it’s bad enough she wants to ask her dad to make another huge donation but he’s in Tokyo for the week and on to London after that. Or you could have convinced him to make regular donations, but okay, whatever. You can’t even volunteer regularly despite all your promises.
[Dove: I’d like to see mention that Lila’s had her credit cards confiscated after she bought a house in the last book. You know, so that would at least explain why she doesn’t just charge whatever the shelter needs to her card. Of course, that’s too much to ask.]
They decide to brainstorm ways to raise money at their next Unicorn meeting, which will be at Jessica’s house.
This leads to Jessica grumping about the Angels and how they used to be a part of the Unicorn Club, “before we realized those girls just aren’t cut out to be Unicorns — they’re way too goody-goody.”
You realized or Kimberly Fucking Haver realized, because I remember things going very differently than you do. [Raven: That’s the problem with having a slew of Ghosties writing a sequential series. A lot of the nuance and intrigue is lost in the transition. It’s like The Telephone Game, slightly altering the meaning with each passing book. By the final entry in the subseries, it’ll all have been Whiskers the Seal’s fault.]
Lila’s smug that Mandy came back to the number-one club, but Gabriella bursts that bubble right away. Her older brother told her that the Angels are the best club at SVMS, and I laughed out loud. (Antonio is apparently a major hunk in the eighth grade. Are eighth grade boys paying that much attention to the Angels and the Unicorns? Because only one member is in the eighth grade, right? And that’s Kimberly in the Unicorns.) [Dove: Who the fuck is Gabriella? The story acts like we know, but we don’t. No mention of the ones we do know like, I dunno, Ellie, Lila’s most beloved little sister that has been yeeted out of the series thanks to the ghosties’ collective ignorance.]
Lila and Jessica decide it is “practically [their] social responsibility” to stop people, especially important boys, especially important cute boys, from thinking the Angels are the best club. I love you both.
We get some cute sibling bonding when Jessica tries to get Elizabeth to listen to a new song and instead finds her swooning over Todd.
I glanced down at my sister’s bed. An open notebook was lying on the end, by her pillow. That figures, I thought. Elizabeth is always writing something—either a story for the 7 & 8 Gazette, the school newspaper, or a plot for a mystery novel, or—“Wait a second.” I grabbed the notebook and grinned. “What is this?”
The notepaper was covered with words—actually, all the same word. Todd. In small letters, in capital letters, in print, in cursive… Todd.
“Hey, put that notebook down,” Elizabeth cried, hurrying over.
I giggled and stared down at the sea of Todds. “I can’t believe it. Mom and Dad always think you’re up here studying—and look at this!”
“I—I am doing homework,” Elizabeth sputtered in protest.
“Oh, sure,” I said, nodding. “And I suppose this is a new course you’re taking? Toddology? Todd Studies? Todd Language Arts?”
I cackled at all the Todd classes, and the image of Elizabeth writing Todd’s name over and over in her notebook is adorable. Such sweet middle school crushes.
Jessica doesn’t understand why Todd is a big deal all of a sudden, which is ridiculous because (a) he was a big deal regularly during the Sweet Valley Twins series and (b) I know he continues to be a big deal well into — possibly the rest of the stories, but at least into Sweet Valley High. I’ve been spoiled that much though mostly I avoid spoilers as best I can (…DOVE). I suppose I can’t blame Jessica for not seeing the future (despite her fortune telling days) but has she forgotten last year so easily? [Dove: Dude. We were already given spoilers for the Jessica/Todd/Elizabeth love triangle (which isn’t really a triangle, but a line and then a single purple dot getting in a huff that Todd doesn’t like her) not just in Elizabeth’s First Kiss, but in The Christmas Ghost, where Jessica flashed foward to Sweet Valley High.]
Only I have always thought I’d be the one to fall in love first. I spend a lot more time worrying and thinking about boys, so it would only be fair. Of course, I’m used to not getting what I deserve, like a huge allowance and a telephone in my room with my own private line.
Wait, did their sixth grade adventures just not happen?! Other than the Unicorn Club existing, I suppose. Because you both had plenty of crushes, and Jessica, you swore you were in love several times last year. Damn, ghostie.
Oh god, it’s not just a Jessica book, it’s a Jessica and Elizabeth book, because in chapter two, we’re over with an Elizabeth POV. Thanks, I hate it. [Raven: While I quite like the Duelling Banjos approach. It’s all very The Devil Went Down To Casey’s.]
She’s obsessing over Todd even while the Angels, sitting at the Angeliner (the fuck is that name? I get that they’re playing off the Unicorner, but Angeliner looks horrific), are talking about other things, their parents, cleaning, weekends. [Raven: I tried to come up with a better word than Angeliner, but I drew a blank. Getting old sucks.]
Elizabeth’s even been dreaming about Todd. In the last one, she spent Elizabeth Wakefield Day with him, a day he proclaimed, and he brought her a red rose, took her dancing in the living room and then the beach and then they were about to kiss.
She woke up before she did and is sad that she couldn’t sleep just a little longer, but come on, surely she’s kissed him before. We’ve had so many first kiss stories, surely. [Dove: She’s kissed him multiple times. Particularly in Elizabeth’s First Kiss.]
It was weird. Back in the sixth grade, we’d gone to some movies and dances together, and we always had a good time. We weren’t really boyfriend and girlfriend, but we weren’t just friends, either.
Now things were different—no dances and no movies. It figured. In seventh grade, you were too old to go to a dance with someone unless you were really dating him—and Todd and I definitely weren’t doing that. In fact, from what I could tell, Todd didn’t think of me as anything besides a friend.
At least Elizabeth remembers sixth grade! I’ll give her the whole not really boyfriend and girlfriend thing because that feels real for relationships around that age (though calling each other boyfriend and girlfriend also happens), though I vaguely think they might have become actual boyfriend and girlfriend at one point, but I can’t believe there’s been nothing in seventh grade. I mean, I can in general, a summer apart can change things a lot (says the person who has been dating Ostrich since eighth grade), but it surprises me for the two of them. [Raven: While I DON’T give her the whole “not really boyfriend and girlfriend thing”, because they have some sort of budding romance in what seemed like every third fucking book or so. And it was pretty much JUST Todd for Elizabeth, not like Jessica shit-kerbing Aaron Dallas whenever a boy with slightly more girth in the gherkin tiptoed through her tulips.]
Talk turns to how much they miss Mandy; they’re all still friends, but it’s not the same now that she’s a Unicorn again, especially because no one can understand why.
The Unicorns are at the Wakefield house lounging around the pool and snapping at each other because god forbid they actually be friendly.
Kimberly shows up late because she was forced to run errands with her mother, and Jessica thinks about how much she likes Kimberly despite her bossy side. Why. Why do you like her. She’s terrible.
Once the meeting officially begins, Jessica and Lila talk about how people think the Angels are the best club. So much for wanting to raise money for the center.
Kimberly decides they have a PR problem and they need to show everyone that the Unicorns are the best club at SVMS.
“We could advertise ourselves!” Ellen suggested. “We could rent a billboard and put our pictures on it.”
“And then what? Say, “Call 1-800-UNI-CORN”?” Mandy laughed.
“Well,” Ellen said, looking offended. “At least I made a suggestion.”
I love you, Ellen, and I am desperate to see what sort of quotes and pictures they’d use for a billboard campaign.
They consider having an article written about them, but they’re not really doing anything newsworthy [Raven: … and they completely blank on the time they had their own fucking newspaper.] — until Kimberly says they’re going to have a huge party for everyone in the school and once it’s over, they’ll be known as the best club.
In order to have everyone there, it needs to be an outdoor party. Jessica volunteers her place for a barbecue and pool party, and that’s not going to be nearly big enough for everyone at their school, considering we learned last book there are around 1000 students.
Mandy brings up the fact that if they’re going to invite “everyone” that really would include the Angels. The Unicorns grumble, but Jessica backs her up and everyone else falls into place, most of them because they’re trying not to offend Mandy for still being friends with them.
If you have to lie and pretend to be something you’re not to keep Mandy in your club, that should tell you something about your club.
Elizabeth starts caring a lot about her clothes, though she won’t tell the other Angels why. She tries out an old red sweater, a black-and-white-checked miniskirt, and a pair of black pumps. Evie and Maria veto it immediately, but it’s not terrible, especially for the 90s. The pumps need to be chunkier shoes (as Evie recommends) and that sweater should probably include a white button-down shirt under it, but otherwise, that’s a very Clueless look. [Raven: As a 48-year-old man, I was baffled by this scene. What’s wrong with Elizabeth’s outfit?]
Of course they miss Mandy’s keen sense of style, but Maria reminds them that they shouldn’t feel bad, they’re a great club even without Mandy, but they do still miss her and, in fact, don’t feel like much of a club now that they’re down to 4 people and the Unicorns have 5. Elizabeth argues that numbers don’t count, but even Maria admits that she feels inferior or something compared to the Unicorns.
Fuck Kimberly Haver for coming back into town and ruining everything and making my girl feel bad.
They mock the idea of being a Unicorn even though they were Unicorns about thirty seconds ago. God, I hate this series.
They talk about how horrid it would be to need to wear purple every day and shop all the time and constantly have crushes and think about boys. Elizabeth is embarrassed and taken aback because, of course, she’s deep in a crush on Todd which she’s very clearly never had before not once during the entire sixth grade year they spent dating.
[Dove: I hate this part of the book. First of all, you guys were all happy to wear a purple ribbon in your hair, and I guess they didn’t discuss boys when they were in the club, but all of a sudden we’re back to the beginning of SVT, and nothing has changed. I know Kimberly has reset them, and they did pull that nonsense with stealing Mary’s speech, which is terrible. However, it wouldn’t take much tweaking for them to miss how the Unicorns were. I mean, they went on the Best Friends Show, so they should miss the friends they made. Second of all, everyone here, except Evie, has been on at least one date, so maybe stop being such judgmental assholes about having crushes?]
Elizabeth actually talks to Alice about the fact that the Angels now feel like losers after Mandy left them for the Unicorns, and that’s even though they are still friends. Alice reassures her and actually gives them the idea to have a fun party to make them all feel good, a barbecue there at the house, taking up the inside and outside of the house, inviting all their friends from school — I’m shocked by this decent parenting and also laughing my ass off at Alice being the one to double book the Wakefield compound.
At dinner, Jessica announces their plans for a party, and of course Elizabeth has already set it up with Alice. Jessica’s furious and accuses her of overhearing the Unicorns talking about their plans and then stealing it. Elizabeth points out that Alice was the one who came up with the idea, and Jessica feels completely betrayed by her own mother.
Ned suggests they have one big party together, and neither twin wants to do that. Jessica thinks Elizabeth sounds rude even though her response is the exact same level as Jessica’s. You’re such a fucking hypocrite, Wakefield. (The entire lot of them, often, but at this moment, it’s Jessica.)
Jessica says they’ll just move their party to a better place. Lila’s house, maybe? Which is large enough it should have been the location in the first place, but okay.
Jessica tells the Unicorns that Elizabeth eavesdropped and stole their idea because who the fuck cares about the truth when a lie is more exciting. This even though she’s starting to doubt that Elizabeth actually did anything wrong. Not that she takes back her story even thinking that.
Sure enough, Lila offers up her house as their new location, and Jessica gets upset that they sort of insult the Wakefield house in the process. Only Kimberly really does, saying the mansion is the much better place for the party, but Jessica paints the whole club with the same brush. [Raven: Jessica is awful in this whole scene.]
Oliver (and some of the other kids) are still grumpy that the Unicorns don’t come as much, specifically Jessica for Oliver, and I remain deeply annoyed that the Unicorns continue to fuck off from their volunteering promises. [Raven: Agreed. I liked the Newnicorns actually doing good stuff. Again, fuck Kimberly Haver.]
(AND SO MUCH FOR RAISING MONEY FOR THE CENTER.)
Mandy and Elizabeth talk about how awkward things are and how they wish the clubs weren’t being so serious and they should all remember that friendships come first.
Despite that, Mandy is reluctant to stop by the Angel party because the Unicorns might not like it.
Good lord, you spineless ass. [Dove: Beige paint Mandy has been spotted. Though she’s not as bad as she was. And I just hate her now, so I don’t really care how she acts.]
Elizabeth, too, notices that the Center is running low on basic supplies and also needs a lot of repairs they can’t afford. Look, shouldn’t someone adult be in charge of fundraisers for this place? I know funding will always be limited, but teens should not be running the bulk of the fundraising.
Elizabeth and Todd run into each other and he offers to walk her home. She invites him to the party, he calls it a date, and she’s awkward, and it’s all so so charming.
The Unicorns try a huge amount of food prepared by the new Fowler chef, poached from some restaurant in France, and then settle down to decide whom they want to invite to their party. I thought you were inviting everyone but the Angels at this point because you want to make sure everyone knows you’re the best club. (And because anyone you don’t invite might go to the Angel party instead.)
They decide to have their party on Friday night at the same time as the Angel party, which I thought was already settled, but whatever, fine, this makes perfect sense.
Mandy admits she feels strange competing with the Angels but doesn’t stand up for this idea long, because why would she, she has no spine and no decision-making ability in this series.
Later that night, Jessica tells Elizabeth that the Angels should consider canceling their party so they aren’t embarrassed when everyone shows up for the Unicorn party instead.
Elizabeth of course figures out immediately that they chose Friday night because the Angels had a party planned and accuses them of having no morals.
“We have plenty of molars—I mean, morals,” I snapped back. “That’s a horrible thing to say!”
…since when do you care about molars or morals? [Dove: This line really bugged me. The jump to “molars” is completely without context. I genuinely believe that it was generated by the ghostie’s typo, and they either thought it was funny or didn’t care enough to remove it. But nobody messes up “molars” with “morals” when speaking. Reading and writing, sure. But speaking – with no other dentistry hints mentioned in the entire book – no. It’s awful, lazy writing.] [Raven: Agreed. It’s not a mistake you’d make when actually speaking the dialogue.]
Their fight escalates until Jessica snaps that if being a Unicorn is so terrible, why did Mandy quit the boring, goody-goody Angels to come back?
She feels terrible when Elizabeth looks like she’s going to cry, but Elizabeth doesn’t believe her when she says she didn’t mean to say that. And why would she believe Jessica? Of course Jessica meant it.
My feet wouldn’t move. How could she just kick me out, after I’d tried to apologize? I did feel bad about what I’d said, but it wasn’t like she didn’t deserve it. I mean, she did call my friends “nasty and unfair.” What Unicorn in her right mind would take that?
Jessica, nowhere in there have you actually tried to apologize! “I didn’t mean that” is not a goddamn apology by itself.
The next day, Mandy apologizes to Elizabeth for telling the Unicorns when the Angel party was occurring. (Sort of. She says she needs to apologize but doesn’t actually say sorry or anything, but it’s at least closer to an apology than Jessica.) She says she meant for them to know so they wouldn’t schedule at the same time, but come the fuck on, Mandy, you should have known it wasn’t going to go like that.
There’s a Unicorn-Angel showdown at lunch, and I am bored. Beyond bored. This bickering is old, boring, and trite. Give me something new. Have them team up against an outside threat. Have them figure out a way to be friends. Have them save the Center (again, so that’d also be somewhat boring). Send them a wild animal to flee. Send them camping and let them be weird. Hell, send them to some sort of fantasy dreamland. I DON’T CARE ANYTHING BUT THIS.
(Werewolves. I still haven’t received my promised werewolves.)
During the fight, the Angels call Fowler Crust boring and Jessica says they’re not even having the party there anymore. Where are they having it? Who the fuck knows. [Dove: The only line in the book I approve of is that Jessica had to fight a smile when Liz called Lila’s house Fowler Crust. That rang true for me. And was surprisingly witty from Liz, who is not amusing at all unless she’s off her tits on wishes or being let down and mocked by her parents. Then I’m Team Liz to the hilt.]
The Unicorns argue over where to have their party (and Mandy is annoyed that Jessica eavesdropped on a call between Elizabeth and Maria but still doesn’t actually do anything), and eventually Mandy suggests they have it at the Center as a fundraiser.
Elizabeth comes up with this same idea later, though they are going to have a secret theme and a secret location. They think this will stop the Unicorns from figuring out what they’re doing, which is true, and will make even more people want to come, which is possible, and will help them raise even more money, which is unlikely if NO ONE KNOWS IT’S A FUNDRAISER.
You fucking idiots.
Another showdown between the clubs, another time of Wing being bored (oh, well, that’s nonstop by now), and Kimberly says that if the Angels steal a guest or two the Unicorns will be left with only two hundred, how terrible.
I thought you were going to invite the whole damn school, Kimberly. And even if only the seventh and eighth grades, that’s still far more than two hundred.
Mrs Willard is reluctant to allow the Unicorns to have the party at the Center because it’s only two days away but gives in when they promise to take care of everything. Don’t believe them, Mrs W! Mrs W does ask why don’t they have their party with the Angels, but the Unicorns shoot that right the fuck down. Again. I’m so tired of hearing about this.
Elizabeth later asks Mrs Willard the same thing and she’s thrilled about the idea. Of course she is.
The Unicorns decide they need to use Todd to get information about the Angel party, Elizabeth has already thought this through and told him to lie to them, Jessica decides to pretend to be Elizabeth to get him to let slip the information, and when Jessica dresses as Elizabeth and meets up with him in the hall, he tells her it’s at the Wakefield house.
I love, love, love that Elizabeth knew Jessica well enough to know what she was going to do. It’s great when people recognize just what these characters will actually get up to in order to get what they want.
I also love that Todd could tell them apart at least with some hints about what will happen. Love it. [Dove: Same. Loved this bit. I wish this Liz would go to SVH, this one that actually knows what a complete monster her twin is. And Todd really sold the idea that he’d accidentally told Jessica the location. Go Team Boring Romance.] [Raven: I too loved this bit, although I don’t see it as proof that Todd can tell the difference between the twins. I pondered on how, logistically, that Elizabeth and Todd could have pulled off the deception if Todd couldn’t tell them apart, and it’s painfully simple: Elizabeth just assures Todd that, until the party, she’ll never ask him anything about the party. Or, more humorously, they agree that they’ll begin every conversation that they have until the party with the word “aubergine.”]
The Unicorns have also decided to do a surprise party and tell everyone to pick up their “special secret instructions” at Casey’s Ice Cream Parlor. That’s kind of adorable.
Todd runs into them while they’re hanging their signs, and Jessica can’t help but gloat that he told her the truth of the location. Okay, I love this part. She’s so smug, he acts all worried that he told her, and I actually grinned at all of this.
The Angels are going to give everyone their map from Guido’s Pizza Palace.
Todd and Elizabeth talk about how she feels so pressured with the parties, and he’s gently supportive and makes the competition sound like fun more than stress. Elizabeth starts to think it might not be a bad idea if Todd’s the only one who shows up. I can’t believe how charming I find their sweet little flirtations. The rest of this book is boring and annoying enough that I’m left here, I guess.
The Unicorns are doing a casino fundraiser, which is cute, and a lot of fun when I’ve been to them, and often illegal based on state gambling, lottery, and giveaway laws, depending on what kind of games and ways to win prizes they include.
The Unicorns put all their things in the big playroom. Mrs W warns them that she started doing repairs in the backyard and so it is off limits to them because it is a mess.
I pushed her playfully. “Anyway, you guys,” I said, trying to be serious, “we’ll have the games over here”—I indicated one side of the room—“and the dance floor right here! People can’t gamble all night.”
Lila raised an eyebrow at me. “You really haven’t been to Las Vegas, have you?”
Legit laugh out loud here. I love Lila.
The Angels also have a bunch of games and they set up in the backyard, of course. Mrs W tells them that she had work started inside and the only place safe is for them to use the bathrooms by the back stairs, and everything else, including the playroom, is off limits.
Mrs W, why are you supporting this?
At 7:15, the Unicorns start worrying that no one has shown up yet, but then everyone starts to show up, starting with Ken, Aaron, and Peter. Before they can do much, though, Aaron and Ken try to sneak away. Jessica catches them at it, they make excuses, and she’s called away to help with the slot machine before she can figure out anything.
Over with the Angels, Todd and Elizabeth are bonding over the dart and balloon booth. Everyone sucks at it but Winston, but Todd isn’t too bothered at all, and they’re all having a lot of fun. It’s 8 and there’s at least 70 people in the backyard.
Bruce and Peter take off, Elizabeth rushes after them, and realizes that inside is packed with Unicorns and their friends. Uh oh.
The two clubs face off yet again and accuse each other of stealing their ideas again and I am terribly bored again as always.
Elizabeth tells Jessica about using Todd to trick her, both sides worry about the other party being cooler, they try to lure people to each other’s party, and OOOOPS, Jessica forgot that she was taking care of the food.
ALSO OOOOOPS, Elizabeth forgot she was supposed to bring soda and juice to the party.
Gee, whatever will the Wakefield twins do?
Elizabeth and Jessica fight in the kitchen, Mrs W tells them that she set it up so they’d both be there at once because they are acting like five-year-olds. She’s not fucking wrong.
They join their parties because the Angels have food and the Unicorns have drinks, what a surprising turn of events. [Raven: Good job they didn’t fully cater for the full party at each club, they’d have twice the amount of everything.]
Todd takes Elizabeth’s hand, leads her off for some quiet time at the jungle gym, and kisses her. Fuck, this is far too adorable, why am I so charmed?!
The Angels tease Elizabeth for gossip about her and Todd and admit that they don’t think it’s too silly to have crushes and kiss boys, and I really love this, too, that they realize they can be serious and do good and also be emotional and have crushes and want to kiss people.
The two parties raised enough money to make a serious dent in all the repair work, and both clubs are absolutely thrilled.
The final few paragraphs set up the next books in which Jessica tells Ellen that she knows more about kids than Ellen does and soon there will be Five Girls and a Baby.
Dear god, please let this be the last of the competing clubs. Will it be? No, I’m certain it will not BUT I AM SO GODDAMN BORED OF IT. I don’t even like baby stories and yet I feel the tiniest bit of a thrill for the next book because surely it cannot be as boring as the constant back and forth between the clubs. Surely.
I also hope it’s not a Wakefield POV, though I’ll admit, having both of them in the story wasn’t as bad as I expected. Maybe because I was already so bored and annoyed at the plot that I didn’t have any room left to dislike the twin POV.
I still can’t believe that I found Elizabeth and Todd adorable and charming. Who am I and what happened to the real Wing? HELP ME.
[Dove: This was awful. I was so bored throughout. I hate that the Unicorns have erased all of their character growth, because it felt like the only reason they wanted to raise money was to prove they were a better club, rather than their emotional attachment to the kids at the centre. It irked me that the “daycare centre” is now called the “child care centre”, and the return of Team Boring did nothing to help. It was just two packs of idiots and I didn’t root for either of them. Also, I have no idea how the fundraiser actually worked, given that nobody was told they needed to bring money, and most tweens (at least in the 80s/90s) don’t have money on them when going to a party hosted by a friend. I know I never did. Basically, none of this worked, none of it mattered. And also, I think Mary Wallace might be dead, because she wasn’t mentioned once.]
[Raven: Meh, this was okay I guess. While I too am sick of the Angel-Unicorn feud, and hope the story joins the clubs again soon so we can get back to the Newnicorns having wholesome adventures and battling the Eights, there were some genuine high spots. Elizabeth and Todd pulling one over on Jessica was pretty cool, and I also liked that the clubs came to their ideas fairly while both assuming the worst of the other side. Nevertheless, it’s time to move on now and return to some semblance of balance, and if we can also yeet Kimberly Haver into space along the way then Let’s Fucking Go.]
I am the evil twin. I’m in a feud with R.L. Stine, but he hasn’t found me here yet. Every story needs more werewolves.