Character: Alice Wakefield

The twins’ mother, often mistaken for the twins’ older sister. Works part time as an interior designer, cooks excellent meals and keep the Wakefields’ “attractive split-level house” spotlessly clean. Sucks at being a parent.

Sweet Valley Twins 26: Taking Charge by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #26: Taking Charge

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins 26: Taking Charge, in which the b-plot is the most compelling thing, because it doesn’t require an iron grip on the idiot ball.

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Sweet Valley Twins 24: Jumping to Conclusions by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #24: Jumping to Conclusions

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins 24: Jumping to Conclusions, wherein Alice might be sleeping around, and the Wakefield kids are going to SORT. THAT. OUT. Cue #BestJess and some wild and zany schemes.

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Sweet Valley Twins 23: Claim to Fame by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #23: Claim to Fame

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins 23: Claim to Fame, wherein the school inexplicably celebrates being 25 years old by burying a time capsule containing stuff from 25 years ago.

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Sweet Valley Twins 22: Out of Place - Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #22: Out of Place

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins 22: Out of Place. Once again the harpies of Sweet Valley decide to bully a new student to the point of suicide, and somehow that’s ok.

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Sweet Valley Twins 21: Left Behind - Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #21: Left Behind

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins 21: Left Behind, where Saint Elizabeth solves everything. Again.

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Sweet Valley Twins 19: The Bully - Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #19: The Bully

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #19: The Bully, a book which begs the question, “What are the cave’s dimensions?”

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Sweet Valley Twins 18: Center of Attention - Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #18: Center of Attention

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #18: Center of Attention. And she loves it. Massively. We can mock her for this.

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Sweet Valley Twins 16: Second Best - Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #16: Second Best

Wing Recaps Sweet Valley Twins 16: Second Best. Where brothers dislike each other, and it’s up to busybody Elizabeth to turn them into BFFs.

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Sweet Valley Twins 15: The Older Boy - Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #15: The Older Boy

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins 15: The Older Boy… and loves it. Despite the easily-apparent squicky idea of a twelve year old dating a sixteen year old, this Jamie Suzanne seems to have pulled it off.

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Sweet Valley Twins 14: Tug of War by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins #14: Tug of War

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #14: Tug of War, the first in the series to reuse a plot – and only two books after the last time this plot was used: student council elections!

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Sweet Valley Twins #13: Stretching the Truth

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #13: Stretching the Truth, wherein Mary is on her second of three surnames and is feeling very out of sorts, and no adult appears to have noticed.

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Sweet Valley Twins #12: Keeping Secrets

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #12: Keeping Secrets, wherein Ned teaches the girls a secret (and tedious) language and IT TEARS THE SCHOOL APART!

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Sweet Valley Twins #11: Buried Treasure

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #11: Buried Treasure wherein Ellen and Jessica find buried treasure at the exact moment the class money goes missing and conclusions are drawn.

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Sweet Valley Twins 9: Against the Rules

Sweet Valley Twins #9: Against the Rules

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #9: Against the Rules, wherein Elizabeth befriends a poor person. And her parents don’t like it. Can you blame them? You don’t live in Sweet Valley to bump into poor people.

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Sweet Valley Twins #7: Three's a Crowd

Sweet Valley Twins #7: Three’s a Crowd

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #7: Three’s a Crowd, wherein we find out that Mary looks just like the twins, and her mother looks just like her, so… um, everyone looks like Alice Wakefield?

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Sweet Valley Twins 6: The New Girl

Sweet Valley Twins #6: The New Girl

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #6: The New Girl, wherein the twins meet a girl so obnoxious that it creates a triplet named Jennifer. Bullying is fun!

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Sweet Valley Twins 5: Sneaking Out

Sweet Valley Twins #5: Sneaking Out

Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #5: Sneaking Out, wherein Jessica nearly kills a dog. And gets rewarded with jewellery.

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Sweet Valley Twins #4: Choosing Sides

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #4: Choosing Sides, wherein Amy wants to twirl a baton, Jessica doesn’t want her to, and Elizabeth feebly stands in the middle, wondering whose side to take.

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Sweet Valley Twins 3: The Haunted House

Sweet Valley Twins #3: The Haunted House

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #3: The Haunted House, where the entire school mistakes an orphan for a witch, and bullies her accordingly.

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