The Unicorn Club #15: Too Cool for the Unicorns
Wing recaps The Unicorn Club 15: Too Cool for the Unicorns and this was real poor timing, though the book ended up a meh offering of yet another friendship lesson.
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Tag: FUCK YOU TAMARA CHASE
Disclaimer: Wing and Dove have no idea why Raven has a beef with Tamara. He doesn’t even explain himself in the recap. But hey, all caps sweary tags are fun.
Sweet Valley Twins #117: Down With Queen Janet!
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #117: Down With Queen Janet, in which Janet Howell does a very passible impersonation of Kyle’s Mom.
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Sweet Valley Twins #115: Happy Mother’s Day, Lila
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #115: Happy Mother’s Day, Lila, in which Jessica does something UNFORGIVEABLE amidst the tears, tantrums and sass.
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Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #9: The Twins Go To College
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #9: The Twins Go To College, in which there’s so much inappropriate grooming it might as well be called Sweet Valley Lolita.
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Sweet Valley Twins #91: Deadly Voyage
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #91: Deadly Voyage, in which there’s genuine, terrifying, nail-biting peril. And the best line EVER from Tamara Chase.
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Sweet Valley Twins #89: Jessica’s Cookie Disaster
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #89: Jessica’s Cookie Disaster, in which Jessica could have poisoned an entire Home Ec class with a little more dedication.
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Sweet Valley Twins #87: The Mother-Daughter Switch
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #87: The Mother-Daughter Switch, in which the twins play Alice, Elizabeth plays Jessica, and Alice plays a bellend.
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Sweet Valley Twins #83: Amy’s Secret Sister
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #83: Amy’s Secret Sister, in which Amy v2.0 charms everyone in a thirty mile radius.
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Sweet Valley Twins #80: The Gossip War
Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #80: The Gossip War, wherein middle school is exactly like the Cold War, Ellen’s dad wears a funny hat, and Johnny Buck again fails to move to Sweet Valley
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Sweet Valley Twins #78: Steven the Zombie
Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #78: Steven the Zombie, which is offensive to voodoo practitioners, the disabled, Harriet Tubman and Sojourner Truth specifically, and is literally the worst Sweet Valley book Dove has ever read. That includes ithig.
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Sweet Valley Twins #76: Yours for a Day
Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #76: Yours for a Day, and is way too charmed by a made-up holiday focused on pink romance.
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Sweet Valley Twins Magna Edition #2: A Christmas Without Elizabeth
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins Magna Edition #2: A Christmas Without Elizabeth, in which Elizabeth Lassos the Moon. Merry Chrismas, Sweet Valley!
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Sweet Valley Twins #74: Elizabeth the Hero
Raven recaps sweet Valley Twins #74: Elizabeth the Hero, in which Elizabeth saves Denny Jacobson’s life over and over again, yet no one thinks to stab Steven in the face.
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Sweet Valley Twins #72: The Love Potion
Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #72: The Love Potion, wherein the Unicorns make a love potion. What, you thought it was a clever title?
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Sweet Valley Twins #70: Psychic Sisters
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #70: Psychic Sisters. If the twins COULD read minds, Steven would be in jail.
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Sweet Valley Twins #56: The Wakefields Strike It Rich
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #56: The Wakefields Strike It Rich, in which Great Aunt Helen gives the Wakefield Siblings a large cash payout, and a reason for them to murder her for a sizeable inheritance.
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