Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #89: Jessica’s Cookie Disaster, in which Jessica could have poisoned an entire Home Ec class with a little more dedication.Continue reading
Evil twins, Wing (she/her) and Dove (she/her), trade Point Horror for Sweet Valley. And they have a secret triplet, Raven (he/him), joining them for a dude’s point of view.
We will be recapping Sweet Valley Twins (and all the special editions, including The Unicorn Club) to start with, and if Wing survives that, we may try other Sweet Valley series.
We upload every week for three weeks, and take a week off. We upload the recap on Monday, and the podcast the following weekend.
Our next recap will be Sweet Valley High #4: Power Play (Dove on 3 Oct 2022) .
Our Podcast music is provided by Stuart Taylor of Legacy Breakfast.
This is the story of the two perfect twins
One is a monster, one died for your sins
One is warm hearted, while the other’s much colder
Both have a dimple, one’s four minutes older.
The first twin’s Elizabeth, she longs to be a writer
Unlike her other half, she’s a lover, not a fighter.
She fixes problems plaguing each and every waif and stray
If you’re new, you’re sure to be her Best Friend For A Day.
The second twin is Jessica. She likes boys and dancing,
The Unicorns and purple, parties and romancing.
She loves the thought of Hollywood, awash with glitz and glamour,
And caving in the skulls of fucking bitches with her hammer.
Together they are bulletproof, a family like no other,
With idiotic parents and dim incesty brother.
Blonde, blue eyed and Aryan, straight from a Nazi rally,
Sieg Heil to the Wakefields. Welcome to Sweet Valley.