Sweet Valley Twins #43: Elizabeth’s First Kiss
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #43: Elizabet’s First Kiss, which sees Elizabeth lose her lip virginity to the inestimable Todd Wilkins… or does she?
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Character: Steven Wakefield
Irritating older brother of the twins. His personality bounces wildly between wise protective big brother and colossal asshat.
Sweet Valley Twins #42: Jessica’s Secret
Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #42: Jessica’s Secret, wherein we find people both stupider and bitchier than the Unicorns, and Elizabeth wants to know: HAVE YOU STARTED YOUR PERIOD?
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Sweet Valley Twins #41: The Twins Get Caught
Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #41: The Twins Get Caught and resorts to bullet points really damn early because it is not a good time.
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Sweet Valley Twins Super Chiller #2: The Ghost in the Graveyard
Raven recaps Sweet VAlley Twins Super Chiller 2: The Ghost in the Graveyard. There’s a ghost… but is it in a graveyard? Enquiring minds want to know!
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Sweet Valley Twins #39: Jessica and the Money Mix-Up
Wing recaps Jessica and the Money Mix-Up and has to resort to bullet points to get through. (WHY DID IT TALK ABOUT BILLABLE HOURS? WHY?)
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Sweet Valley Twins #37: The War Between the Twins
Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #37: The War Between the Twins, in which Jessica launches a rival newspaper, many lies are told and Amy Sutton can just get in the f***ing sea.
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Sweet Valley Twins #36: Mary is Missing
Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #36: Mary is Missing and though everybody’s a sleuth no one wears a dramatic trench coat.
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Sweet Valley Twins #35: Amy’s Pen Pal
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins 35: Amy’s Pen Pal, in which Amy Sutton loses a new friend to siren call of the Unigibbons. Will they steal her friend forever?
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Sweet Valley Twins #34: Jessica the Rock Star
Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #34 Jessica the Rock Star, in which Jessica both CANNOT and CAN sing, and the Unicorns host a billion parties.
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Sweet Valley Twins #33: Elizabeth’s New Hero
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins 33: Elizabeth’s New Hero, wherein a visting East German gymnast dreams of defecting to the warm bosom of Sweet Valley. Tear down the wall!
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Sweet Valley Twins #32: Jessica on Stage
Wing Recaps Sweet Valley Twins #32: Jessica on Stage, wherein Jessica gets mentored by the Sweet Valley equivalent of Doris Day. Because why not?
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NaNoWriMo2017: Jessica vs Elizabeth – Chapter 5
Dove continues to #NaNoWriMo. The tributes have been picked. How is everyone dealing with this? You might guess “not well” is the answer. You’d be right.
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NaNoWriMo2017: Jessica vs Elizabeth – Chapters 3 & 4
Dove continues to word vomit for NaNoWriMo. The Hunger Games tributes are announced. Who will be on there? Do they have a hope in hell against Jessica? (No, they don’t. They need your sponsorship. Sponsorship = leave a comment, not money.)
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Sweet Valley Twins #31: Jessica’s Bad Idea
Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins 31: Jessica’s Bad Idea, in which the most loathesome creature on the planet goes toe-to-toe with… Jessica? Yes. There is someone *worse* than Jess in Sweet Valley.
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Sweet Valley Twins #29: Jessica and the Brat Attack
Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #29: Jessica and the Brat Attack, wherein Jess faces four children more evil and annoying than herself. And Wing has zero sympathy. It is beautiful.
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Sweet Valley Twins #28: April Fool!
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #28: April Fool! This book sees Elizabeth and Jessica join forces against their brother Stephen, who has become possessed by a giant squid. The fourteen-year-old sandwich chomper threatens to squirt his murky ink all over Sweet Valley, and the twins decree he Must Be Stopped. (Actually, that’s a big lie… April Fool!)
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Sweet Valley Twins #27: Teamwork
Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #27: Teamwork, in which a dog gets a bad dye job and Ken Matthews doesn’t get paid for his hard work. Oh, and the twins exist.
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Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #2: Holiday Mischief
Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #2: Holiday Mischief, in which there are spies, disappearing ink, and the most inept choral leaders on the planet.
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Sweet Valley Twins #24: Jumping to Conclusions
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins 24: Jumping to Conclusions, wherein Alice might be sleeping around, and the Wakefield kids are going to SORT. THAT. OUT. Cue #BestJess and some wild and zany schemes.
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Sweet Valley Twins #23: Claim to Fame
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins 23: Claim to Fame, wherein the school inexplicably celebrates being 25 years old by burying a time capsule containing stuff from 25 years ago.
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