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Sweet Valley Twins #78: Steven the Zombie by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #78: Steven the Zombie (1 Apr 2019)
Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #78: Steven the Zombie, which is offensive to voodoo practitioners, the disabled, Harriet Tubman and Sojourner Truth specifically, and is literally the worst Sweet Valley book Dove has ever read. That includes ithig.

Tags: comments by Raven, comments by Wing, Dance Baby Dance, Double Dipping Plot, FUCK YOU TAMARA CHASE, massively offensive twaddle, recaps by Dove, Wing goes BOOM

Elizabeth’s book-long soulmate: Poor disabled and homeless Benjamin

Jessica’s hobby of the moment: Caring about the disabled, Voodoo

Characters: Cathy Connors, Elizabeth Wakefield, Ellen Riteman, Janet Howell, Jessica Wakefield, Joe (aka "Sam") Howell, Lila Fowler, Steven Wakefield, Todd Wilkins

Relationships: Cathy Connors/Steven Wakefield, Elizabeth Wakefield/Todd Wilkins, Jessica Wakefield/Aaron Dallas

Events: Party: Lila Fowler

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Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #77: Todd Runs Away (26 Mar 2019)
Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #77: Todd Runs Away, and, shock of all shocks, REALLY LIKES TODD WILKINS. Who replaced her with some sort of Sweet Valley pod person?!

Tags: A+ parenting, Big Mesa SUCKS!, comments by Dove, comments by Raven, Double Dipping Plot, Great Ghosties, I'm running away!, recaps by Wing, That brand new tradition we've always had

Characters: Elizabeth Wakefield, Jessica Wakefield, Mark Ramirez, Mr Bowman, Mr Clark, Mr Wilkins, Mrs Wilkins, Steven Wakefield, Todd Wilkins

Relationships: Elizabeth Wakefield/Todd Wilkins

Events: Basketball Game, Elizabeth's First Bra, Jessica's First Bra, Writing Classes

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Sweet Valley Twins #76: Yours for a Day by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #76: Yours for a Day (13 Mar 2019)
Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #76: Yours for a Day, and is way too charmed by a made-up holiday focused on pink romance.

Tags: comments by Dove, comments by Raven, Dance Baby Dance, Elizabeth Has A Spine!, FUCK YOU TAMARA CHASE, No means no - unless you're Jessica, recaps by Wing, The twins CANNOT sing

Characters: Amy Sutton, Belinda "Billie" Layton, Elizabeth Wakefield, Ellen Riteman, Grace Oliver, Janet Howell, Jessica Wakefield, Julie Porter, Ken Matthews, Lila Fowler, Lloyd Benson, Mandy Miller, Mary Giaccio-Robinson-Wallace, Peter Jeffries, Todd Wilkins, Winston Egbert

Relationships: Amy Sutton/Ken Matthews, Elizabeth Wakefield/Todd Wilkins, Grace Oliver/Winston Egbert, Jessica Wakefield/Aaron Dallas, Mandy Miller/Peter Jeffries

Events: Hospital Fundraiser, Valentine's Day, Valentine's Day Dance

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Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #75: Jessica and the Earthquake (4 Mar 2019)
Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #75: Jessica and the Earthquake, which unfortunately does not have the same body count as the Sweet Valley High book called Earthquake.

Tags: A+ parenting, comments by Raven, comments by Wing, Elizabeth Has A Spine!, Raven disapproves of the faculty, recaps by Dove, too many Peters

Jessica’s hobby of the moment: Being psychic, predicting earthquakes

Characters: Alice Wakefield, Amy Sutton, Bruce Patman, Elizabeth Wakefield, Ellen Riteman, Janet Howell, Jessica Wakefield, Joe (aka "Sam") Howell, Lila Fowler, Lloyd Benson, Mandy Miller, Steven Wakefield

Relationships: Cathy Connors/Steven Wakefield, Elizabeth Wakefield/Todd Wilkins, Jessica Wakefield/Aaron Dallas

Events: EARTHQUAKE!

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Sweet Valley Twins #73: Lila's Music Video by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #73: Lila’s Music Video (4 Feb 2019)
Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #73: Lila's Music Video wherein Lila eats off-brand ice cream and learns the value of friendship (again)

Tags: comments by Raven, comments by Wing, Plucky girl detectives, recaps by Dove, The twins CAN sing

Jessica’s hobby of the moment: Singing

Characters: Betsy Gordon, Elizabeth Wakefield, Grace Oliver, Janet Howell, Jessica Wakefield, Johanna Porter, Julie Porter, Kimberly Haver, Lila Fowler, Tamara Chase

Events: RockTV Contest

Ned’s Law Discipline: Defense, Litigation

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Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #72: The Love Potion (28 Jan 2019)
Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #72: The Love Potion

Tags: comments by Dove, comments by Raven, Double Dipping Plot, FUCK YOU TAMARA CHASE, Plucky girl detectives, recaps by Wing, Sweet Valley Time, That brand new tradition we've always had, too many Peters

Characters: Elizabeth Wakefield, Jessica Wakefield, Kimberly Haver, Lila Fowler, Mandy Miller, Mary Giaccio-Robinson-Wallace, Peter Burns, Steven Wakefield

Relationships: Cathy Connors/Steven Wakefield, Jessica Wakefield/Aaron Dallas, Mary Giaccio-Robinson-Wallace/Peter Burns, Mary Giaccio-Robinson-Wallace/Tim Davis

Events: Charity Carnival, Johnny Buck concert

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Sweet Valley Twins #71: Jessica Saves the Trees by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #71: Jessica Saves the Trees (14 Jan 2019)
Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #71: Jessica Saves the Trees wherein #BestJess attempts to save the trees, Elizabeth is genuinely useless, facts are a last resort.

Tags: #BestJess, Big Mesa SUCKS!, comments by Raven, comments by Wing, Jessica's New Fave Hobby, No means no - unless you're Jessica, recaps by Dove, too many Peters

Jessica’s hobby of the moment: Saving the Environment

Characters: Alice Wakefield, Amy Sutton, Elizabeth Wakefield, Janet Howell, Jessica Wakefield, Lila Fowler, Mandy Miller, Ned Wakefield, Steven Wakefield, Winston Egbert

Relationships: Elizabeth Wakefield/Todd Wilkins, Jessica Wakefield/Aaron Dallas

Ned’s Law Discipline: Litigation

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Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #5: The Curse of the Ruby Necklace by Jamie Suzanne

Super Chillers: Sweet Valley Twins Super Chiller #5: The Curse of the Ruby Necklace (1 Jan 2019)
Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins Super Chiller #5: The Curse of the Ruby Necklace and it has everything wonderful! Vengeful ghosts! Murder mysteries! #bestjess everywhere!

Tags: comments by Dove, comments by Raven, Elizabeth Has A Spine!, Elizabeth is SMART, Jessica's New Fave Hobby, Plucky girl detectives, recaps by Wing, Something Must Be Done, SUPERNATURAL OOOOH, Wing's heart grew 10 sizes

Elizabeth’s book-long soulmate: Robin (Wakefield?)

Jessica’s hobby of the moment: Acting

Characters: Alice Wakefield, Amy Sutton, Elizabeth Wakefield, Ellen Riteman, Janet Howell, Jessica Wakefield, Lila Fowler, Mandy Miller, Maria Slater, Ms Mendez (Assistant Principal), Ned Wakefield, Robin (Wakefield?), Steven Wakefield

Events: movie: Dead Little Rich Girl

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Sweet Valley Twins #68: The Middle School Gets Married by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #68: The Middle School Gets Married (10 Dec 2018)
Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #68: The Middle School Gets Married, wherein each twin gets paired with an even worse version of themself and wacky hi-jinks ensue with bonus baby (egg) death! #RIPStevenFidos #NeverForget

Tags: A+ parenting, comments by Raven, comments by Wing, Great Ghosties, Not enough Ellen, recaps by Dove, Shame you're not a perfect size 6

Characters: Bruce Patman, Elizabeth Wakefield, Jessica Wakefield, Lila Fowler, Ned Wakefield, Patrick Morris, Rick Hunter, Sarah Thomas, Sophia Rizzo, Steven Fido I-VI, Todd Wilkins

Relationships: Jessica Wakefield/Rick Hunter, Sophia Rizzo/Patrick Morris

Events: Marriage Project, Rizzo/Thomas Engagement

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Sweet Valley Twins 67: Jessica the Thief by Jamie Suzanne

Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #67: Jessica the Thief (3 Dec 2018)
Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #67: Jessica the Thief, and it's fun enough for an overdone plot and subplot. Also: Jessica is a damn thief all the damn time. Except this time.

Tags: comments by Dove, comments by Raven, No means no - unless you're Jessica, Plucky girl detectives, Poor little Jessica, recaps by Wing, THANK GOD FOR ELIZABETH, TWIN MAGIC

Elizabeth’s book-long soulmate: Amy Sutton

Characters: Aaron Dallas, Alice Wakefield, Amy Sutton, Bruce Patman, Elizabeth Wakefield, Ellen Riteman, Janet Howell, Jessica Wakefield, Joe (aka "Sam") Howell, Lila Fowler, Mandy Miller, Mrs Arnette, Ned Wakefield, Steven Wakefield, Veronica Brooks

Relationships: Elizabeth Wakefield/Todd Wilkins, Jessica Wakefield/Aaron Dallas, Veronica Brooks/Bruce Patman

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