Ellen Riteman

Member of the Unicorn Club. Thick as two short planks. On the covers, she always looks like she’s been transplanted from the 1950s.

Sweet Valley Twins #66: The Great Boyfriend Switch

 Category: Sweet Valley Twins

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Sweet Valley Twins 66: The Great Boyfriend Switch by Jamie Suzanne

Raven recaps The Great Boyfriend Switch, and needs a spreadsheet to keep track on all the Twinny subterfuge.

Sweet Valley Twins #63: Poor Lila!

 Category: Sweet Valley Twins

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Sweet Valley Twins 63: Poor Lila by Jamie Suzanne

Dove recaps the best book in the series, Sweet Valley Twins 63: Poor Lila!, wherein Lila is poor, the twins are nearly absent and EVERYONE is sassy.

Sweet Valley Twins #61: Jessica the Nerd

 Category: Sweet Valley Twins

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Sweet Valley Twins 61: Jessica the Nerd by Jamie Suzanne

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #61: Jessica the Nerd, in which Jessica is forced to choose between Nerds and Unicorns, with surprising (and entertaining) results.

Sweet Valley Twins #60: Ciao, Sweet Valley!

 Category: Sweet Valley Twins

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Sweet Valley Twins #60: Ciao, Sweet Valley! by Jamie Suzanne

Dove recaps the most offensive book in the series to date, Sweet Valley Twins #60: Ciao, Sweet Valley! wherein Jamie Suzanne wants us to really hate Italy. It’s ok though, we just hate the Jamie Suzanne instead.

Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #4: The Unicorns Go Hawaiian

 Category: Super Editions

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Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #4 The Unicorns Go Hawaiian by Jamie Suzanne

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #4: The Unicorns Go Hawaiian

Sweet Valley Twins #52: Booster Boycott

 Category: Sweet Valley Twins

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Sweet Valley Twins 52: Booster Boycott by Jamie Suzanne

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #52: Booster Boycott and burns everything to the fucking ground. Fuck gender essentialism. Fuck heteronormativity. Fuck Wakefields Must Win.

Sweet Valley Twins #50: Jessica and the Secret Star

 Category: Sweet Valley Twins

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Sweet Valley Twins 50: Jessica and the Secret Star, by Jamie Suzanne

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #50: Jessica and the Secret Star, in which the New Girl has a dark and mysterious toilet-paper-shaped past…

Sweet Valley Twins #49: The Twins’ Little Sister

 Category: Sweet Valley Twins

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Sweet Valley Twins 49: The Twins’ Little Sister by Jamie Suzanne

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins 49: The Twins’ Little Sister by Jamie Suzanne, and no, the twins are not ready to be big sisters. They will never be ready.

Sweet Valley Twins #48: Mandy Miller Fights Back

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Sweet Valley Twins #48: Mandy Miller Fights Back by Jamie Suzanne

Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #49: Mandy Miller Fights Back, in which we meet the best Sweet Valley peripheral character yet!

Sweet Valley Twins #46: Mademoiselle Jessica

 Category: Sweet Valley Twins

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Sweet Valley Twins #46: Mademoiselle Jessica by Jamie Suzanne

Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #46: Mademoiselle Jessica, wherein Brooke becomes Brookette (trés French) and Jessica’s family use humiliation to teach her a lesson.