Sweet Valley Online

Evil twins snarkily recap Sweet Valley Twins, High, University, Confidential & Sweet Life

Character: Ellen Riteman

Member of the Unicorn Club. Thick as two short planks. On the covers, she always looks like she’s been transplanted from the 1950s.

Sweet Valley Twins 63: Poor Lila by Jamie Suzanne Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #63: Poor Lila! by Dove
Dove recaps the best book in the series, Sweet Valley Twins 63: Poor Lila!, wherein Lila is poor, the twins are nearly absent and EVERYONE is sassy.

 Jessica’s hobby of the moment: 

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Sweet Valley Twins 61: Jessica the Nerd by Jamie Suzanne Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #61: Jessica the Nerd by Raven
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #61: Jessica the Nerd, in which Jessica is forced to choose between Nerds and Unicorns, with surprising (and entertaining) results.

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Sweet Valley Twins #60: Ciao, Sweet Valley! by Jamie Suzanne Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #60: Ciao, Sweet Valley! by Dove
Dove recaps the most offensive book in the series to date, Sweet Valley Twins #60: Ciao, Sweet Valley! wherein Jamie Suzanne wants us to really hate Italy. It's ok though, we just hate the Jamie Suzanne instead.

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Sweet Valley Twins 52: Booster Boycott by Jamie Suzanne Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #52: Booster Boycott by Wing
Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #52: Booster Boycott and burns everything to the fucking ground. Fuck gender essentialism. Fuck heteronormativity. Fuck Wakefields Must Win.

 Elizabeth’s book-long soulmate: 

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