Sweet Valley Online

Evil twins snarkily recap Sweet Valley Twins, High, University, Confidential & Sweet Life

Character: Bruce Patman

A super-rich, super-cute boy who is a year older than the twins, but appears to have no friends his own age, so he hangs out with the sixth grade. Seems like the type who wears a banana-hammock.

Sweet Valley Twins #68: The Middle School Gets Married by Jamie Suzanne Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #68: The Middle School Gets Married by Dove
Dove recaps Sweet Valley Twins #68: The Middle School Gets Married, wherein each twin gets paired with an even worse version of themself and wacky hi-jinks ensue with bonus baby (egg) death! #RIPStevenFidos #NeverForget

 Characters: , , , , , , , , , ,

 Relationships: ,

 Events: ,


 leave a comment
Sweet Valley Twins #60: Ciao, Sweet Valley! by Jamie Suzanne Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #60: Ciao, Sweet Valley! by Dove
Dove recaps the most offensive book in the series to date, Sweet Valley Twins #60: Ciao, Sweet Valley! wherein Jamie Suzanne wants us to really hate Italy. It's ok though, we just hate the Jamie Suzanne instead.

 Characters: , , , , , , , ,

 Relationships: 

 Events: 


 5 comments
Sweet Valley Twins 52: Booster Boycott by Jamie Suzanne Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #52: Booster Boycott by Wing
Wing recaps Sweet Valley Twins #52: Booster Boycott and burns everything to the fucking ground. Fuck gender essentialism. Fuck heteronormativity. Fuck Wakefields Must Win.

 Elizabeth’s book-long soulmate: 

 Characters: , , , , , , , , , , ,

 Relationships: ,

 Events: ,


 leave a comment
Sweet Valley Twins 44: Amy Moves In by Jamie Suzanne Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #44: Amy Moves In by Raven
Raven recaps the totally forgettable... erm... huh... what was it again? Something to do with a fire? Oh yeah, Sweet Valley Twins #44: Amy Moves In.

 Elizabeth’s book-long soulmate: 

 Characters: , , , , ,

 Events: 


 3 comments
Sweet Valley Twins Super Edition #3: The Carnival Ghost by Jamie Suzanne Super Chillers: Sweet Valley Twins Super Chiller #3: The Carnival Ghost by Wing
Wing forgot to fill this in, so Dove will summarise: Wing falls hopelessly in love with this awesome story, wherein Liz makes BFFs with a ghost, Lila is sass personified, Jessica is a true believer, and DOVE WAS RIGHT THAT THIS IS THE BEST SWEET VALLEY BOOK EVER.

 Characters: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

 Events: , , , ,


 1 comment
Sweet Valley Twins #38: Lois Strikes Back by Jamie Suzanne Sweet Valley Twins: Sweet Valley Twins #38: Lois Strikes Back by Raven
Raven recaps Sweet Valley Twins #38: Lois Strikes Back, in which Sweet Valley's resident fatso climbs on a bike in the name of charity...

 Elizabeth’s book-long soulmate: 

 Characters: , , , ,

 Events: 


 1 comment